-Just Another Shattered Victim

- I Don't Even Know ,

I Woked Up To The Smell Of Sausages And Eggs Peanut Better And Blue Berry Pancakes ..

YUMM..

I Walked Down Stairs To See My Dad Cooking ,

GoodMoring Dad , I Said, While Sitting At The Counter On The Marble Stool ,

Hm...

He's Sober ? Sober SOBER...

Good Moring Nana , We Have To Talk Baby Girl , My Dad Said Placing BlueBerry Pancakes Infront Of Me .

Dad , I Dont Wanna Talk Bout What Happened  Yesterday Please Just Not Right Now I Said , While Looking Down At My Lap ,

Look Nana, I Was Gonna Tell You They Left Jordan Out With A Bond , But he's Not Allowed To Be Around You AnyMore , They Said Your Absoultly Nothing But Trouble And They Are Sending Him Back To California  With His Grandma For The Rest Of HighSchool Life , Look Nana, I Know Your Upset But I Gotta Know Whats Going On , I Cant Lose My Child To Some Idiot Abusive Bastard . . I'm Not Gonna Let Him Hit You AnyMore , And Even Though You Went Against My Approval Of Him I'm Still Bee Here For You , You Are My Flesh , You Are My Child ,Look I Cant Lose You And If It Means Us Moving Away Or Giving Him Ten To Life Then that's What We Will Do , Bby Girl I Love You Nana Virckianna Jones ,

I Love You Too Dad . I Got Up From The Counter & Hugged Him , You Not Gonna lose Me Daddy I Promise ,

So Um Troy Is Not In A Coma , Hes Out Of The Hospital , he's Suspended For 5 Days & he's Gonna Bee Back Next Tuesday' , Jordan'Was Suspended For 10 Days . .Jordan ain't Left Texas Yet And He Told Me He Wants To Come See You Without Hes Strict Ass  Parents  , I'm Gonna Go Let You See Him Nana , He Cares For You , y'all Been Bestfriends Since You Were 3 , Look I Think You Should Go Straighten Things Out , I Know I'm Not The Best Father But I'm Telling You To Make Your Own Choice , I Prayed For The First Time In Years Last Night , I Asked Him To Forgive Me , Save Me & Save Me From My Own Self , Cause I Know I Have To Bee Here For You , I don't Think If I Didnt Have You For All Those Years I Wouldnt Bee Here , Just Stay Strong For Me , I Remember When You Were First Borned , You Didnt Even Cry , You Just Came Out And When They Cleaned You All Up And Handed You To Me You Smiled At Me , It Warmed My Heart , The Doctors Told Me You Were "Perfection " An Angel , They Never Seen A Baby Not Cry . That's When I Knew You Were My "Angel" & You Were A Beginng Of A  New Life.. I Love You Nana,

My Dad Hugged Me While Saying ,

Awh , Daddy , I Know Your Trying , I love You Too , Momma Would Bee Proud Of You , Your weren't The Greatest Dad But You Tried, Your A Strong Guy Daddy You Really Are , I'm Sorry If I Ever Disrespected You Ever , You Deserve A Award Tbh ,  , I Love You SO Much .. And Yeah So I Wanna See Jordan' . . He Doesnt Have His Phone Does He ?  I Really Dont Know What Am Gonna Do With Out Him , I Know I don't Really Talk To You Bout These Sort Of Things But I Think I'm Falling For Jordan Dad ,15 Years . . Is A Long Time . .I Dont Know I'm So Confused ,  I don't Feel Good Enough And I Just Ugh I Think He Deserves Better

Like he's Mother Says , I'm Nothing But Trouble ...

Why Am I Not Good Enough Daddy ?

Look Angel . Yus 15 Years Is A Long  Time , You Guys Are UnSeraparable I Think , I Think You Truley Do So Love The Kid And Wanna Bee With Him But Its Dick Face Getting In The Way , You Are Beauitful Nana , You Are Good Enough , Fuck What Hes Mother Said . you Are My Child . I Will Allow You To Be Around Him Along As Hes Here , Jason Hes Older Brother Said That You Can Text Him , He's Numher Is 352-459-4325

So You Can Meet Up With Jordan , Look If You Ever Needa Talk I Am Here Okay ? lets Not Keep Stuff From Eachother AnyMore Okay ? I'm Your Dad I Gotta Know These Things Okay?

Okay Dad , Thanks I Love You , I Said Walking Up The Steps To Go Get Dress . ,

30 Mins Later ,

I Look In The Mirror ,

My Red Skinny Jeans ,

My White Shirt With Misfits In Red Color On The Back ,

My White Docs And My Hair In A Messy Bun ,

Yusssssss .

I Went Down Stairs And Saw My Dad DownStairs Drinking Coffee & Watching The News.

Okay Dad , I'm Leaving , I 'll Bee Back At 9.

Okay Nana He Said,

And

...

I Hopped In 2013 Chevy White Truck And Drove Until I Got The Chill Bay Park , I Saw Jordan's Charger In The Parker Lot And Parked Next To It , He Jumped Out And Went My Car Door And Opened It And Hugged Me ,

I'm Gonna Miss You Jordan , I Cry In His Shoulder ,

Nana Dont Cry Love , Im Gonna Miss You Too , He Said While Hugging Me Tighter,

How Did You Get To Get Out The House Without Your Mom Following You ?

Ha, Jason Lied & Said He Was Taking Me Out To Eat Before My Last Day Here , And That He Was Gonna Talk Some Sense In Me Then Maybe I Can Stay If I Just Stay Away From You , And My Mom Said Sure , Cause She Doesnt Really Wanna Send Me Away , He Grip My Hand ,

But Lie And Say You You'll Stay Away From Me Jordan Please Dont Leave Me ,I Said While Holding  His Hand Back ,

But ..Okay Nana I Will Try , My Mother Is Crazy , But I Will Try , I Love You Nana ,

And With That Said....

He Kissed Me And I Kissed Back ,

Our Tongues Having A Battle ,

After That Little Make Out Session ,

We Just Looked At Eachother ,

Jordan ?

Yes Nana ?

I Love You . .I Really Do , Not As A Bestfriend But As More . .