Set me free |-/ Tyler Joseph (continuation book)

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/Tyler/

Why?
Why now?
Because you deserve it, punching bag.
The only girl that I've felt something towards in a very long time is sitting, waiting for me. I don't need you.
She doesn't need you. The only reason she's waiting is because you have those big sad brown eyes that everybody pities. A pathetic puppy.
Just please, go away.
Do you want me to leave just like Jenna? She didn't stay as long as I have. I told you she didn't love you. Neither will that victim sitting in the coffee shop waiting for a prince on a white horse, but all she's going to get is an idiot riding a donkey.

;

Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. "LEAVE ME ALONE!"
My hands are over my ears but everything just seems louder. My eyes are closed, but I still feel the warmth spilling over them, cascading softly over my cheeks. He's right. I'm pathetic. Jenna left me. Because I wasn't enough.  I dragged her down. Always gone, out with Josh, anywhere but next to her. No wonder she thought I cheated on her. I didn't deserve her, just like I don't deserve May. That feeling is coming back. I don't like it, but I want to.

I hear my phone buzz on the tile next to me, gently nudging the floor so I know that I have a text.

May: Hey Tyler, is everything okay?

Sent: 4:26 PM

"No." I just repeat to myself. It's 6:13.

Disappointment.

I'm a disappointment. It's not like that's nothing new for me, but it hurt a little more because it was her. Made my diaphragm restrict a little more. Made me cry a little more. Conceited. Arrogant. Narcissistic. That's what you are. A self loathing piece of shit who couldn't even keep a marriage for more than 2 years. Worthless.

My thumbs dance across my unnecessarily bright screen. As if they were doing rehearsed choreography. Playing a concerto of sadness. 

You: I'm sorry.
You: forget me.
May: Tyler omg where are you?
You: I don't expect you to be, but if you're still at the coffee shop, you can leave.
May: TYLER I NEED YOU TO TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE.
You: goodbye, May.
You: :)

/May/

It's funny how one little emoticon can make me have so many heart palpitations, isn't it?

Shit guys hi I'm sorry. There's a lot of stuff happening. A very close family friend had died, lots of school shit, (mainly my absolutely horrible math teacher) and just all around me trying to just barely scrape my grades together. I know it's really short, but I promise I will try my hardest on the next one. Lots more detail, and in the end after a while, I will probably go back through and edit the chapters to make them better and smoother to read. I hope you guys have wonderful lives, and take care of yourselves. <3