Don't shut me down ● Luke Hemmings

4. "For you, for us."

One day, a particularly awful day, Leah was having the worst time in her life. She was almost failing one of her most important classes because she couldn't focus on anything. She could barely sleep and her mind was a bigger mess than it ever was. Finishing college was her first priority but today she was doubting if she could even do it.

And to make that day worse, when she was almost at her apartment her mom called. It's not that they had a bad relationship, it's just that they had different ideas in life and that is what made them argue often. So when Leah parked her car she answered the call with a sigh and went straight to her apartment, wishing nothing more but to be in her bed and never leave.

"Hello?" Her voice was barely audible.

"Hi sweetheart, how are you doing?" Her mom asked excited.

"I'm fine mom, how about you?" She lied.

"I'm great. I just wanted to talk to you, catch up a little you know?" Her excitement didn't stop, even with how much tired Leah's voice sounded.

"Yeah, but there's nothing new going around here mom." She said while climbing up the stairs. She was too afraid to go on a lift alone. But her apartment was only on the 3rd floor, so it wasn't too much.

A moment passed until her mom's disappointed voice asked back. "So, you're telling me you haven't got yourself a boyfriend yet?"

"Not everything turns around having a boyfriend, mom! We already had this conversation too many times." Leah almost yelled. This is how most of their calls went. Her mom always had to get what she wanted but Leah never gave her that pleasure.

"If we had this talk so many times you should realize how important it is to have someone with you." She answered right back clearly annoyed, just when Leah was opening her apartment's door.

"But I don't need someone, mom! I'm fine by myself!" The girl almost cried to her mom, begging for her to drop the subject. She closed the door and heard her mom yell.

"Don't raise your voice to me, young lady!"

"I'm sorry mom, but I have to go." She almost whispered and ended the call. She headed to the stairs, seeing how her vision was blurred with tears. As tears escaped and she tried her best to cry silently because she didn't know if someone was home. Once she entered her bedroom she closed the door and fell in her bed, letting it all out. Minutes later her pillow felt like a pool because of her tears, but she wouldn't lift her head from it. She was tired, she needed a break from everything. When she was almost falling asleep the door opened and woke her up. She didn't move but she felt someone sitting next to her in her bed.

"Not now Michael..." Her voice broke. "Please." She deep breathed, trying not to start crying again. "I need to be alone." She asked, feeling defeated. He didn't move from his spot but I felt his hand slowly brush my hair, trying to relax me. It felt good and it was making me fall asleep again. But again, his voice stopped me from doing so; because his voice wasn't Michael's.

"Being alone isn't always the answer." He spoke, and I knew exactly who he was. I sat up, trying to clean my face and my hair with my hands so I didn't look so broken.

"What are you doing here, Luke?" I whispered, having no strength to yell at him.

"I was hanging out with Michael but he left to go grocery shopping. Then I heard you yell and cry and I couldn't be downstairs not knowing if you were okay or not." He half smiled. She looked at him for a while until she broke down.

"I need space." She started crying. "I need space to breath without everything falling on my shoulders. Without everyone always behind my back always telling me what I have to do." She was sobbing now. "I'm exhausted." And with her final confession Luke's heart broke even more than when he saw the state she was in when she got home. He wanted nothing more than to help and fix her. She was looking in his eyes with tears falling down her face and looked so vulnerable.

He didn't know what he was doing but he didn't stop. His hand rested softly in her cheek and his lips in her forehead, kissing it softly. Feeling that she didn't back away he sighed in contentment. She couldn't, even if she wanted. She had no strength at all.

"Lie down and get some rest." He whispered against her forehead. "I won't let anything bother you." And with that he backed away and they stared at each other's eyes for a while. She looked at him confused and he looked at her with so much passion in his eyes. 

She did as he told and closed her eyes, wishing she could stop all the thoughts running in her head. She thought he would leave her alone in her room but he didn't; he wanted to make sure she had everything to get some well deserved rest. When he didn't move for some long minutes she whispered what was on her mind, with her eyes still closed.

"Why don't you give up?" She sighed. "Why do you still act like you care?" He moved closer to her and started playing with her hand.

"I can't." He stated truthfully looking at her exhausted face. "You have this thing that I can't get enough of." He paused and sighed. "I can't stop thinking about you; I can't stop this feeling of wanting to protect you from the world and make you mine."

"I'm not this perfect thing you think I am, Luke!" She opened her eyes and stared back at him. "I'm so much trouble, my mind is a complete mess." She started crying again, feeling her heart break for the hundred time that day.

"I don't care how troubled you mind is, Leah. I'm here for you, I'm here to help you get on your feet. You grew on me, I can't let you go, you mean too much to me."

"It's not that easy! You don't fix someone with a click of your fingers!" She sat up and yelled at the golden boy.

"I'm willing to try! For you, for us! I love you, Leah." He looked at her with worry in his eyes. She was pushing him away again.

"You need to leave, Luke." She held her blank face and then stared at the ground, not being able to look at that heartbroken boy. He tried to speak but she cutted him off begging him to leave her alone with tears running down her face.