MANAN - Cloud with a Silver Lining

9-Sorted Past Confused Present

................Nandini's POV..............

Smile found a way on my lips as we drove back with me replaying the evening I just had in my head... What a eventful evening...Meeting everyone was so much fun...yes it was like a bumpy road to begin with but as the evening progressed we were in for a laughter ride...We were reminiscing the past...we recalled several instances from the past which brought smiles on our faces...Replaying those happy moments was so much fun..!!!...And not to forget pulling Abhi and Mukti's leg..I saw Mukti blushing, a sight that I never thought I'll witness....I was in awe of this beautiful couple and in a silent prayer to Aiyappa I wished for them to stay in love forever..I asked him to bless them with the "TOGETHER" I and Manik could never have...

Manik and his thoughts never left my mind since morning...Honestly I was nervous to face him...I knew all my uneasiness was because I couldn't foresee his reaction..My mind was muddled up with various possibilities..What if he lashes out on seeing me after 5 years...what if his anger take over yet again...what if he had changed in these 5 years...but what if he didn't...there was a time when I could predict his next move even before his mind had completely processed it but gone were the days...!! Anyways Manik took me by surprise by his reactions throughout the evening... He was the second one to walk out after Mukti not to avoid me but to knock some sense out of Mukti's head..."Think rationally...don't act impulsively as impulsiveness will make you loose something really beautiful."I heard him saying as I was standing outside the room door...This Manik was not new to me...He always had the best advice to give..He was very rational in his approach towards everything...This was one of his virtue I found myself attracted to but Alas he turned completely irrational when it came to the matters involving me..Why Manik..??...When I entered I sensed he was unconformable around me , so was I but I was amazed at the composure he maintained throughout the discussion...As Cabir said, I guess Manik had really grown up into a mature and levelheaded individual...I wouldn't lie I was immensely proud of it....Better Late than never...!!...

Everything was going on fine till that asshole Madhyam made an entry...His voice..his gestures made me restless but I had to face him and I did...After giving him his piece of mind I excused myself not only to calm myself down but also to avoid all the questions everyone at the table had...I left Aryaman and Myra to answer them and when I returned I found teary eyes, shocked faces and dejected Abhi...but one pair of eyes were spitting fire..Yes they were Manik's and since then those eyes never diverted their gaze from me...Once Aryaman was done filling me in with the issue, I got really stressed and looked up only to meet Manik's gaze...After giving it a thought I decided to sing myself and asked Myra to get my friends backstage because I needed him.. You may call me selfish but Manik's eyes carried the strength I needed...Actually they always did...for instance the first time I performed on Stage in SPACE, I was scared but I sang the whole song looking into those deep brown chocolaty eyes...Today I needed him all the more...I was scared..No wait...!! Pertified...!!!...

With the song I conveyed my emotions too..and I don't know why I felt that he too resonated with me in the same manner...When Abhi asked to me to sing publicly I blatantly refused since I had lost all the strength to loose anything else...I lost my confidence and I lost MY Manik...Music might not be the real culprit but it definitely was the precursor...Amidst everything Manik's behavior indeed got me thinking...I couldn't help but admire his new Avatar right infront of me...for a few minutes I saw Manik in a new light and it was heart-warming...

Soon my bubble broke when he said "If you really don't want to loose things or people, hold on to them tightly not letting them go"....Manik's words echoed in my head...how easily he could blame it all on me...did he really think I was reason for our fall out...Here I was thinking that he has changed but has he..??...For a brief moment he got me thinking that he cared but did he..??...Oh God..!! Why Aiyappa...why is it so confusing...??