Little Notes (Skylox)

Chapter 7: Love or Lust?

A/N

Have I made up my mind? We will have to see in Ty's and Adam's friendship. No spoilers.

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Ty's POV

'Omg...omg... I'm so.... ughh... why subconscious????' I thought to myself on the way to the store. My heart races as I try to suppress the dream. To no avail, it comes back with a more vivid details.

***********The Dream********************

I was sleeping in Adam's bed, not in mine. I turn to see him waking and pulling me to his chest. What surprised me was that he was shirtless and so was I. Our skin brush against each other, and I feel my cheeks burn.

Adam chuckles and kisses them to tease me. I look away only to have his hand pull my chin to face him. He inches closer and his lips hover over mine. I can feel his breath and I move in hesitantly. Our lips contact and he kisses me with such gentleness. My face was now all crimson.

His hands slowly explore my chest and back. Finding where to hold onto me and such swift movements make me cold. I pressed against him and he leans in. One of his hands trails down to my pants and....

**************End of dream**************

I snapped out of my dream mode as we park into a space. My breaths are uneven and my cheeks are warm. 'No... not again!!! If Adam knew, he would be disgusted.'

I do my best and push the rather provocative dream out of my head. Adam takes a cart and enters the store with me next to him. We got basic ingredients, ready made food and some beverages.

When we turned to the sweet part of the store, Adam lost it. His face is full glee as he checks out the candy and cookies. He turns to me and with puppy eyes begs silently if he could buy them. I laugh softy and let him. He smiled hugely and went off to find more goodies.

I look at the cake mixes and wonder if I should get some. I glance up to find Adam and find he's talking to a girl. She looks our age and has a quite a figure. 'STAY AWAY FROM HIM.' my subconscious threatens. I surprise myself but watch them out of the corner of my eye. They exchange what I believe to be their numbers and they hug goodbye.

I automatically frown. 'No... I can't accept this....' I think selfishly. But he and I are not in a relationship. So I shouldn't get jealous because he's talking to girl. 'But she's very pretty and has a great body.' my subconscious argues. Yeah, so? I mean, I like Adam as a best friend and he does, too. 'Lies!!!! What about the dream last night??? That didn't seem like friendship love. That was lust.'

I quickly stop fighting with myself as he returns to the cart. He looks pleased. "Just met a middle school acquaintance of mine... she moved five years ago and I can't believe how much she's changed." He says. "Really? That's interesting." I answer.

'Jealousy...That's what I'm feeling...Adam is not mine.' But, I can't help myself. He sweet, funny, and I just love everything about him....'WHHAAAATTTT????!!!' Do I love him??? What about the dream?? My subconscious said that was lust. I'm sure it is.

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Back Home

We had just finished putting away the groceries.

I continue this conflict in my room. I like him as a friend. No, I love him. Yet, I see him in rather naughty way. I go to my Wall of Notes to see if I had written anything like this. I got out a flaming red sticky note and write my conflicting feelings down. But, I'm not going to post it. If Adam walks in, he could find the note easily with its color.

I leave to make him some dinner to find him putting on a blazer. 'Strange...' "Going on a date?" I ask jokingly. "Something like that." he says. My heart stops. "With...your middle school friend?"

I continue hesitantly. "Yeah, she invited for dinner at a restaurant." My heart starts aching. "Sorry, I guess I'll have to try your food later." he apologizes. With he gives me a hug goodbye and goes out the door.

I start to make some tacos and listen to the silence. The silence in Adam's flat is different from the first time I heard it at my old home. There, it felt like the apartment could breathe easily and peaceful. Here, it was sad and lonely like the flat was missing something. That something was Adam.

I sigh sadly. I hope he enjoys himself. I eat my tacos on the empty table and think. It's been while where I just thought about anything other than the recent events. I don't like this. I'm used to talking now and going back to holding my tongue is uncomfortable.

There's nothing left to do except wait for him. 'That's if he comes back at night. What if he comes in the morning???'

I shake my head. He can do whatever he pleases. Even, if that is doing certain things with others...Anyway, I need to stop being jealous.

-------Three hours later-------

Adam's POV

I came home to a sleepy Ty on the couch. 'He looks so cute...' I walk over and touch his porcelain pale cheek. He moves from my touch and slowly opens his eyes. "ADAM!!" He sits up straight and fixes his bangs. "I'll warm up some food!!! But you already ate!!! Are you thirsty???" He exclaims. Seeing Ty panic like this is adorable but then I remember he's used to doing things for his dad.

I grab his hand as he gets off the couch. "Calm down... I'm fine." I say. He looks at me and he reluctantly sits down next to me. He's still wondering wether I was fine. "How was the date??" Ty asks. "It was fun. She told what happened in her five years, I told her mine and reminisced about school memories." Ty looks a bit relieved but looks down at his hands and asks, "So...are y-you guys going o-out...?"

"She asked me if I wanted to be in a relationship with her," I start. The corners of Ty's lips twitch. "But, I told her I'm actually interested with someone else at the moment." Ty turns to face me. "Who is it?" "Not saying." "Why not???" he whines. "If I tell you, you're gonna tell them." He looks at me with mixed feelings.

Yeah, I am interested with someone else. Someone so different. Someone who's coming out of hiding. The funny thing is I feel so distant from him even though he's just a door away from my room.

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Omg... it's been over a week!!!
I can't believe it. I had writers block and I found a new love.

It's an anime called World's Greatest First Love aka Sekai-ichi Hatsukoi.

I'm going to get most of my ideas from this. I love this anime.

(Warning: it contains major Yaoi aka BoyxBoy Love)

Next chapter is going to be slightly humorous...