This facade
I play
just to seem all right.
I'm not,
I'm mentally ill.
I love to draw on myself
with a sharp paint brush
and my epidermis as a canvas
I couldn't let him go. I was too consumed. To in love when he wasn't.
I fell into depression. I tried many things. I didn't just draw on myself. I swam. I drank... and I fell.
I flew too. I tried to. Nam Joon stopped me.
And so I just stuck to drawing on myself.
I couldn't sleep, when you were running around my mind twenty-four seven.
And I fell deeper for you and this lonely void.
I asked myself, was I too fat? Lee Ahn was skinny, so I starved myself. Was I boring? Lee Ahn wore party dresses, so I wore them and drank over my limits.
I was so infatuated by you, that I tried things that I promised myself I wouldn't do. I stopped cutting.
I got a tattoo and went out more. I didn't do anything besides sit on the edge of a cliff. It's not like it's going to fall.
-
this was heavy
