Magisterium stuff

Snippet 1

"As a proof of how sincerely I am sorry, I could give you some of my best romantic tips," Jasper offered.
Call, who'd been about to perch on one of the arms of the sofa, started laughing so hard that he fell. He hit his bad leg against the floor – which hurt – but not enough to keep him from howling with mirth.
Tamara was smiling, but clearly trying not to. Her lips kept twitching up and down at the corners.
"Are you okay?" Aaron asked, leaning over to help Call up.
"Yes!" Call managed to say before he started laughing again. He flopped onto the couch on Aaron's other side, still wheezing. "Fine! I'm fine!"
"Number one," Jasper said, with a frown at Call, who clearly didn't appreciate the wisdom that was about to be dispensed, "when you talk to a girl, you have to look her right in the eye. And you can't blink. That's very important."
"Doesn't that mean your eyes start watering?" Aaron asjed.
"Not if you do it right," Jasper replied significantly. Call wondered what that meant. Were you supposed to develop a second eyelid, like a lizard?
"Okay, so Tip One is that you stare right at a girl," said Call. "If you like her."
"Tip Two," Jasper went on, "is to nod at everything she says, and laugh a lot."
"Laugh at her?" said Tamara, dubiously.
"Like she's hilarious," said Jasper. "Girls like to think they're charming you. Tip Three: smolder at her."
"Smolder?" Aaron echoed in disbelief. "What's that, exactly?"
Jasper straightened up, tossing his hair back. He lowered his eyelashes and stared directly at the three of them, his mouth turned down in a grim scowl.
"You look mad," Call said.
Jasper squinted even harder, closing one of his eyes and staring meaningfully out of the other.
"Now you look like a pirate," said Tamara.
"It works on Celia," said Jasper. "She melts when I do that."
"She must like pirates," said Aaron.
Jasper rolled his eyes. "Tip Four is to have the right haircut, but that's obviously hopeless for both of you."
"There's nothing wrong with my hair!" said Aaron.
"It's all right," said Jasper. "Call's looks like he cut it with a sharp rock."
"Is there a Tip Five?" asked Tamara.
"Buy her a cat calendar," said Jasper. "Girls love cat calendars."- The Bronze Key