Lost Hope

Chapter 1

Ellen's P.O.V

"Hey baby!" I was currently on the phone to my boyfriend Luke. We have known each other for so long, and he is currently on The X Factor. The first live show was about to begin and I was ringing him to wish him luck. I do miss him terribly, but it will be worth it in the end. There was never any privacy when Luke was in the house, so it was difficult to have a proper conversation with him. Sometimes the tension and pressure to maintain this relationship to be to much.

"Hey babe, how's my girl?" I couldn't exactly hear what he was saying as I heard loads of screams in the background.

"I'm good thankyou hun, what's your day been like?" I didn't know if he heard me or not, as the screams got louder.

"Yeah it has been MENTAL! I practised and practised, but all I can really think about is you. I really wanna see your beautiful face Ellen, but I know that's not possible right now." I silently screamed in my head, sometimes he didn't want to talk, acted like he didn't love me, other times he would shower me with love and attention, and this was a time.

"Aww honey, I really wanna see you too! Good luck for tonight as well!" I didn't know what to say, but I couldn't get him worked up.

"Thanks hun! Listen, I'm sorry babe but I have to go, live shows is calling me! Haha, love you. Bye baby girl!"

"Bye ho-" I didn't even get the chance to finish my sentence, as the phone beeped to say that the conversation had ended. These were the difficult times, the times when I just wanted to quit. I started writing my feelings down on the piece of paper beside me, the anger inside of me was bubbling. What did a girl have to do to be with the person she loved?

Life could be so difficult sometimes, but why did it always happen to me?

"Your Saturday night starts right here!" And here it goes. The torture of seeing his face on national telly, knowing full well hundreds of other girls were thinking that he was hot, and marriage proposals on Twitter. I was scared as to what might happen by the end of tonight. Nobody knows what is going to happen. He could muck up, and I would be the one to have to fix it. Or it could go really well, and that means that I will not see my boyfriend for a couple of months. Maybe by the end of this process, I won't even have a boyfriend...!

So this is the first chapter, vote, comment, follow xoxo