One More Time

I'm sorry

I don't know which is worse. Losing my legs or losing her. Both will be hard to live without. The doctors said that I lost my legs. That I would never walk again. And yet I still wished that I.. did anything to save her. It is too late now. I am still having a hard time to believe it. Abel and his friends were soon arrested thanks to his friend that felt what they did was wrong. Anton died on his way to the hospital due to too much blood lost.

What is there to live now? Why should I even try to make things better? What's in it for me? I lost everything that I ever wanted. Might as well I kill myself.

Now it has been about 20 years since the accident. I am currently living in this huge house all by myself. I think it is the best, I need time away from people.

I know I said before here that Juliette is still with me at this age. Well, I lied. I am still trapped in the past, where I was happily living my life with her. I'm probably stuck in an illusion where she is happy by my side. I know I have to accept the fact that she's gone. But I don't want to. Because without her, what do I have left?

But because of Juliette Moreau, my life is a wildlife safari park. It was an adventure. I still sit here and imagine all the "what if"s. What if I wasn't fired from my first job? I wouldn't be working at the market where I first saw her. What if I didn't fell down the stairs? She wouldn't have stop to help me. What if I didn't take the risk of flying all the way to Paris to pursue my dreams? None of this would've happened. Although my life is full of mistakes, I still believe I did my best to have a good one. If only, if only I could see her one more time. I need to see her one more time.