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XI.

"I didn't have the courage to break up against your will. Nor the courage to continue holding onto your hand with this creaking heart."

June 16th

Your words still echo in my head

"Let's break up."

It's not that I didn't want to break up

I'm just scared to be without you..

But

when I muster the courage

Of looking into your brown eyes

And biting my lip to stop the tears

I babble

The words are lost and forgotten

And I feel like

I'm choking.

I know

I can't do this

I can't look at you

Without feeling sorrow.

I can't hold your hand

Without hearing my heart

Break into a million pieces

I can't say your name

Without an emptiness.

I'm dragging you along

And I feel like the worst human being.

but

I can't imagine life without you.

Your smile makes me push through

Your laugh is like sunshine on a beautiful day

You're my anti-depressant.

I need you here.

I hope you stay..

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