Repairing a Broken Heart Shaped Mirror

August 24th 2015

My Broken Sword and Shield

Last weekend was hell. Being in the same house with someone who hates the ground you walk on is very hard. I can't even be in the same room with him for five minutes without tearing up. All I can hear is him calling me that God forsaken word and the hatred in his eyes. Today at school I could feel myself on autopilot. Elijah found out what happen through my Mom last night and he has been pissed ever since. Elijah and my father has always butted heads even when he was little. I watch Elijah and Gabe practice since mines is literally after theirs. I just stared into space not really looking at anything. I felt an arm around my shoulder, I looked over to see a sweaty Elijah frowning. I sighed, "Look Elijah, I'm fine." Elijah frowned deeper, "Bennie I know you, I know what's bothering you." I shook my head already knowing what my persistent brother is going to say. He sighed, "Bennie it will be fine fun just you and me." I looked back at the field to see Gabe smiling at me. "How are we going to get the money for an apartment," I asked. He just grinned, "Just leave all that to me and after your practice for now on you're going to Gabe's house." I just nodded as he got up and smile down at me than ran to the field.

At practice we were learning sidelines for the up and coming football game. We were having a water break when my phone went off. I reached in my duffle bag to see my Mom calling me. I answered hearing my Mom upset voice, "Bennie please come quick it's your brother he's in the hospital." My eyes widen and my heart beating rapidly vibrating my whole body. "What happened," I asked in a weak voice. She sighed her breath shaky, "After he came home he went straight to your room and started packing your clothes and your Dad asked where were you going and your brother told him that you were moving out. Your Dad wasn't having it, there were yelling, screaming then I heard a loud thud. I ran upstairs to see Elijah unconscious and he wasn't breathing right so called the ambulance." She started crying heavily. I grabbed all my belonging, "Mom, it's going to be alright I'm on my way." I ran out of there and straight to my car. Good thing Elijah got a ride from one his football friends or I would be stuck here. I sped out the parking lot onto the vacant rode. "It's all my fault, if only I was normal this wouldn't have happened."

After blaming myself the whole car ride the hospital, I jumped out the car to see my Mom sitting with her face in her hands. I crouched down in front of her, "Hey Mom I'm here." She looked up and engulfed me into a hug and cried on my shoulder. I looked around to see my father nowhere in sight, "Where's your husband?" She pulled back and looked at me, "That's still your father Bennie." I rolled my eyes, "Well according to him I'm not his son." She gave me a heavy sigh. It's not my fault Ross is a homophobic ass. "Mrs. Tucker," My Mom and I turned to the doctor smiling sadly, "I have good news and bad news." She nodded for him to continue, "The bad news is that your son is in a coma," My Mom busted into tears once more, "But the good news is he should wake up within a month or two." I snapped my head towards the doctor, "A month or two!? Is there any way for you to speed that up?" He shook his head. My head hung to the floor, a single tear slipping out. This is all my fault, only if I wasn't born then this wouldn't have to happen. I looked up with a waterfall of tears rolling down my face, "Can we go see him?" The doctor nodded leading us to Elijah's room.

The doctor opened the door which contained my big brother. We walked in to see an almost lifeless body that was littered with bruises. I gasped a hand over my mouth in shock. I couldn't believe someone I called "father" would do this to his own son. I couldn't even move my legs, he looked so fragile like if I took one step he would shatter into pieces. I've never seem Elijah so vulnerable. He was always the tough one, the protective one. He was the one who I called if I needed anything he was like my sword and shield. I know that makes me sound like a coward but even if I tried to do something on my own Elijah was there to help even if I didn't want it. But I wasn't there for him when he needed me, what type of brother am I?