Good Boy Ryker [COMPLETED]

Chapter 29: Mathletes, Now That's Social Suicide

Chapter 29

❮ Devyn Foster ❯

Bad girls will always be bad girls.

I've learned to accept that.

Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere. The whole 'bad girl' thing allows me to mess up sometimes. And I have freedom to say more of what I want to. So when Casper brought it to my attention this morning that I was turning I almost puked. I mean, just thinking about it; I'm getting chills all over.

I am not turning good. I don't think that I'll ever become the slightest bit of good. Bad girls don't suddenly turn good for their little good boys, what are the odds? That's impossible. Their was absolutely, positively no way me, Devyn Foster, would ever become a good girl. Especially like Belle Sanchez, her name even makes me want to puke up blood.

When Ashton brought it to my attention that there would be a nerdy, math club event hosted at school my first reaction was hell no. Like who in their right mind would attend school on a Saturday. And then he told me that Ryker was going to be in it and my entire perspective changed. I suddenly wanted to attend. I just wanted to see his geeky ass in action.

I laughed to myself.  

Or course, I had no idea if I actually liked Ryker, but I did know he was way better than the bad boys I've came in contact with, and that soon these feelings I had for Ryker might change into something more, even though I didn't want them too.

Everyone knows bad boys will treat you bad, but Ryker was sweet, and gentle with me. And I admit; I kind of loved it. More than anything and that pains me to admit.

He makes me feel better about myself. He makes me feel. . . loved, worth it. 

I'm used to boys flirting with me for months over the phone, and then ghosting me without giving me a reason why. I'm used to going out on a few dates, finding a red flag that's impossible to ignore, and then moving on to the next guy. I'm used to immense disappointment and pushing people away. I'm not used to boys like Ryker. He's the type of guy I want to keep around and honestly, I have no fucking idea how to make this feeling go away.

I came to terms with being single a long time ago. But now that I've found him, someone I intend on keeping around. I know I'm fun to sleep with and drink with, but I don't know if I'm really girlfriend material. Not that Ryker was making me his girlfriend or that I wanted him too... he has Belle. 

Anyways I'm just confused because, when I screwed over my exes, I didn't care, because they didn't matter all that much to me. They were just around to keep me happy until I found a relationship that was the real deal. But Ryker? I couldn't stand hurting him. I found myself liking him more than I've ever liked someone before, which is why I'm getting paranoid.

There was no way in hell I was changing for this good boy. I needed to clear my head — and most of all I needed to be the Devyn Foster. The girl who always went out for fun. The girl who just didn't give a fuck about anyone or anything. I needed to be that girl again.