[[Written September ninth, 2016]]
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Alone, he sits in his bedroom, binge watching old television shows and movies. They comfort him, but not enough to keep him off of his mind. He always pops up, everywhere, whenever anything is involved. It's absolutely ridiculous, and the young man often has to scold himself because he shouldn't be thinking of his friend that much, not like that. His heart will ache if he thinks about him being with someone else, or the possibility that his feelings for the young binge watcher could fade to the low status of "Just Friends". He's terrified of that. For, he'd give up anything for that boy, anything except how he feels for him. He's gone into detail while talking about the shorter male to himself, about what he'd do just to be near him. The way he makes him smile is something he wouldn't trade for anything. The happiness he supplies him, almost in doses, is something that he only wants to be permanent, but only from the short goofball that he's found himself head over heels for. He sometimes cries while thinking about the younger boy; mostly from happiness, sometimes due to the sadness of being so far away from him or just the fear of loosing him. He knows they'll be physically together, someday, and he doesn't care how. He's woken up and cried because of his loneliness, yearning for the other to be there with him; to tell him everything was alright and to eventually calm him down. The poor boy, his heart must be getting real sick of everything that's happening. I mean, with how often his heart beat speeds up while thinking about and talking to the younger boy, I'm surprised his heart hasn't given up. He doesn't mind the increase in speed from his heart beats, the spinning of his thoughts, or the butterflies in his stomach he gets from the smaller lad when he says something particularly kind, cute, or sweet. He just truly loves the way that boy makes him feel, and he wouldn't give it up for anything, regardless of the heartache.
