The Way I See It

Lucas

As a guy ok with everything there isn't much I have to say. The day I first the girls was the best day of my life. I remember looking up at a blonde beauty. And a pretty brunette. Ok I get that i put more thought into "Blonde Beauty" than "pretty brunette". Even the I'm dating Riley I can't help but have stronger feelings for maya. I remember the day I met her. We had a 10 second relationship. Best 10 seconds of my life. I'm a gentleman it's how my pappy joe raised me. So I can't just leave Riley for her best friend. I know maya still likes me and I know she always has. I just need to move the brown stuff out of they way so I can see clearly. In this case the brown stuff is the brunette. Every time maya grabs my shirt I want to lean in for a kiss. Anytime she ha-hurrs me I want to grab her face again. I know I sound like a fuckboy thinking about another girl while I'm with someone else. I thought I loved her. I knew I loved maya. Next time I'll stick to the facts. I don't know how to deal with this. Seeing maya everyday with the urge to kiss her, but I can't. Riley can barely look at me now that we are together. Most ignorant thing I ever did was choose Riley as my girlfriend. Hopefully one day the sludge will be out of the beaker and I can see maya.
      I almost did, on New Years. She was going to kiss me. Then Riley said she loves me. She doesn't love me. You can't love anyone, until you learn to love yourself. Riley is so worried about what others think of her. She will never learn to love herself.
     Maya has been through so much crap though. She had to learn to love herself at a young age. So I know she loves me. I want her. She is the one I've always wanted.
      She's my shortstack of pancakes.
       She's my Penelope.
       She's my blonde beauty.
       She's my everything.

I messed up bad. I'm like every other guy in her life. Some way I need to show her the love she never had.