"You know those moments?
Those that felt so right,
yet haunted you in a way that felt so wrong.
It's scary, you know? like as if suddenly with the light touch of your fingertips this moment would be lost. Forgotten. Never to be felt again. But you know it's real. You've felt it.
It's always been the way he looks at you, with that smile of his that had left you breathless since the day you saw him. Or the way the sun glares relentlessly in your eyes but you wouldn't care because you're with the only person that could ever make you feel this way.
You knew he broke you. But you had fallen for him so hard, that you saw right past it, convincing yourself time and time again that it wasn't his fault, but you knew it was. Part of you knew the moment you met that this wouldn't end well. But you were blinded; blinded by the way he flicks his hair and how the strands fall in place perfectly each time. Or maybe even just how deep his dimple cut into his left cheek as he'd laugh to your lame jokes. You loved every part of it. Even the parts of him that had fucked you over and yet you never seemed to mind. You fell for him so fast, even you never saw it coming.
You put aside the fact he stopped asking how your day was, and instead how he now put his friends before you, or if he kissed a girl in front of you and called it an accident; you'd force yourself to think he hasn't changed but the truth was that, you were only too caught up with the feeling that came along with it, you saw right past his lies. The ones that continued to scar you till this day, and yet you were willing to sacrifice anything for him.
The thing is,
he didn't feel the same way. And that's what hurt you the most."
- excerpt from a book i'll never write #1
