we're all mad here | b.u & d.w

9. stoned

// trigger warning : hell lotta drugs //

"There's no way that's your full name," I say through intense laughter, Pete sighs.
"Yep. He's Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz III," Patrick chuckles, I burst into laughter once again.
"So your dad and grandad are both Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz's?" I ask, Pete nods as we all chuckle. Pete breathes out the fumes of his joint, creating a puff of thick smoke.

Dallon walks in the room and joins up on the floor,
"Hey Dal Pal," Pete smiles, Dallon rolls his eyes,
"Hello Peter," he sighs, Dallon grabs a piece of rolling paper and some already grounded marijuana. He starts to place the marijuana down and roll the paper, eventually creating a joint. Dallon looks at me and hands it to me.

I place the joint back between my tightened lips. Dallon nods for reassurance and flicks the lighter on. The flame dances around the twisted end of the tube and sets it alight. The end burns up some before Dallon blows on it gently and instructs me to inhale. I let my lungs take charge and I suck a deep breath, letting the burning toxicity fill the pure insides of my chest.

As I continue to breath it in, everything seems right in the world. The voices stop screaming at me to end my life, the pain in my head shrinks and is replaced with the feeling of happiness and having no cares in the world. I smile widely at my new found joy and being okay.

"Brendon, you alright?" Pete asks concerned as he takes the joint out of his lips and breathe.
"I'm okay," I continue to smile as wide as I've ever smiled in my life.
"I'll smoke to that," Josh , raising his joint as if he was making a toast,
"You'll smoke to anything Joshua," Halsey mocks, winking in his direction causing Josh to put his middle finger up.

•

"Go on Patrick," we all egg on, Patrick shakes his head,
"Go on Stump, just play a little part of one of your songs," Pete says, nudging Patrick's shoulder.
"God sake guys, okay a bit of one of my songs," Patrick sighs, grabbing the dusty guitar that still sat in the corner of the room. He places his joint tightly in his mouth before quickly tunes the guitar. Patrick takes a massive puff out of his joint before folding it between his two fingers. He gently starts to strum on the guitar.
"This is one I wrote, Peter actually helped with it. I've called it Grand Theft Autumn," Patrick chuckles before starting to softly sing.

'Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman,
Maybe he won't find out what I know.
You were the last good thing about this part of town.
When I wake up,
I'm willing to take my chances on.
The hope I forget,
That you hate him more than you notice,
I wrote this for you.
You need him.
I could be him.
I could be an accident but I'm still trying,
That's more than I can say for him.
Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman,
Maybe he won't find out what I know.
You were the last good thing about this part of town.'

We all clap and cheer as Patrick brings it to a close,
"That was amazing!" I smile, as Patrick blushes violently.
"It's not all that great, besides that's only a bit of it," he chuckles, placing the guitar on his lap and returning to his joint.
"Patrick, stop bloody putting yourself down. You're amazing at it, everyone knows it. You're the most talented guy we all know," Pete frowns, playfully punching Patrick in the shoulder. We all nod in agreement.

"Hey Bren, you said you wrote songs. Perform one for us," Halsey blurts out, I frown.
"Yeah go on, it's like an initiation process to see if you can hang out with us," Dallon adds, I sigh. Patrick hands me the guitar and I hold it in my hands.

"Um, this is one I wrote a while ago. I never had a name for it, I was debating calling it Time To Dance so I'm going to go with that for the moment," I say, everyone nods and I have their full attention. I gulp, taking a massive breath. I start to gently strum on the guitar before starting to sing the lyrics I had written to go with it.

'Well, she's not bleeding on the ballroom floor,
Just for the attention.
'Cause that's just ridiculously odd.
Well, she sure is going to get it.
Here's the setting.
Fashion magazines line the walls now,
The walls line the bullet holes.
Have some composure,
And where is your posture?
Oh, no, no
You're pulling the trigger,
Pulling the trigger,
All wrong..'

I take a deep and heavy breath as I finish the song. I scan everyone's face, they're all grinning widely before they all start clapping.
"That was amazing Brendon," Josh smiles, I blush and lean on the guitar.
"That wasn't about Invisible Monsters was it?" Dallon asks, my eyes widen and I start to nod violently as I chuckle quietly.
"I appreciate it kiddo, also you're talented. Have you considered selling these songs?" he asks, I flash him a confused look.
"Please, my songs are shit. Bedsides, they're a way for me to put out my emotions so for me to sell them is really useless as it'll be my emotions not the singers and I don't like that idea," I sigh, Dallon nods understanding.

"Fuck!" Pete shrieks, looking down at his phone,
"What's wrong Peter?" Josh asks, Pete jumps to his feet and findiges,
"I gotta get home, it's 10pm. My dad's gonna kill me," Pete sighs as he grabs his backpack.
"Bye Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz The Third," we all mock, Pete puts his middle finger up at us as he exits the room.

It's only a matter of time as one by one we all go our own ways, Tyler was the first to leave, Josh followed nervously, then Dallon left so I leave a few minutes after. Leaving Halsey and Patrick in the room alone.

"Hey Brendon," I hear a timid voice say as I arrive at my bedroom door. I turn around with a jump to reveal a tall, lanky Dallon towering over me.
"I swear to god Dallon, how much taller can you get?" I joke causing Dallon to chuckle slightly, "What's up?" I add, trying to act casual with the situation.
"I just wanted to tell you that you're a cool guy and apologise that you're hear," he says, looking down at him feet as he speaks to me.
"Wow, thanks. You're cool too," I chuckle, I yawn loudly.
"I'll let you sleep. See you tomorrow Bren," Dallon smiles walking back to his room,
"Night Dal," I smile back, entering my room, stripping and getting into an oversized t-shirt and my boxer shorts.
I throw myself on the bed and instantly fall into a deep sleep.