Monster.

Chapter Five

As I lay there staring at the silver-ish walls, the voice in my head continued to taunt me. As much as I fought back, it didn’t stop. The sun climbed up the sky, brightening the outside world. It was an unusually nice day here in England. Most people would say it was beautiful, but it was only a bit of sunlight that forced its way through the dark clouds that layered the sky.

‘Worthless. That’s all you are.’ The voice was relentless. The more I responded, the harder it returned with worse and worse insults. When I didn’t respond at all, when I tried to hold back, it attacked me in even more torturous ways.

My entire life, the voice had never been this bad. It had come and gone once in awhile. It always returned with the same words to make sure I knew how despised I was. This amount of hate was strange, and almost physically painful.

My shoulder was still burning from the alcohol seeping into it and the headache was making everything worse. The physical exhaustion along with this pain made me wish for nothing more than to fall back into darkness, but the nightmare was still haunting me.

I knew I had to sleep at some point, but the farther away in time the better.

So, the only option was to take the emotional and physical pain.

It was getting harder and harder to bear as the day went on and the pain reliever wore off. Even though I knew there was someone in the room next to mine, I felt more alone than ever.

My mind was still having a mental war. Words clashing throughout the barricade of my skull, making it pound from the pressure being placed on it. I lift my hand to pinch my nose to attempt at relieving the pain, but that just made my shoulder ache even more. I wanted pain killers more than anything, but I knew they would put me to sleep.

What hurt worse; agonizing mental and emotional pain that messed with my mind for hours on end until I was sure I was going crazy or a throbbing pain that was physical and could be stopped by sending myself into the other pain? If I stayed in the state I was now, only feeling the pain in my body, then I would be hurting less, right? That was my logic. So, I have to stay awake and deal with it.

I hear a shot somewhere outside and a distant scream. It would have chilled most people to the bone, but I was used to it. It was quite common in this part of England and you would be surprised at how many deaths there was every month. Gangs, drug dealers, prostitutes, you name it. They would all be found on the streets here, less than a mile away from each.

There were a few more sounds of gunshots, each one getting closer to where we were. I wasn’t worried until I hear pounding and yelling from the room Niall was in. In the next second, he rushed into the room, shoving his phone in his pocket, making it evident that he had just finished a conversation.

“We have to go.” He picks me up like a child once more, rushing quickly to the back of the flat. I didn’t know what was going on and it was obvious Niall didn’t care about my shoulder enough to try to keep it from being pained by his running.

The bullets continued to boom in the distance that wasn’t so distant anymore. It didn’t sound any more than a block away. When we reached the very end of the flat, we got to a door. When Niall swung it open, it led to a damp hallway with faint lights lining it. The carpet was stained with things I didn’t want to think about and it smelled of rat and rotting flesh. We turned into it, my hands clutching his shirt and his arm wrapped just under my ass, supporting me.

The gunshots were getting closer and I could hear pounding steps from the levels above us. They knew as well as us that we had to get out of there. I still had no idea where we were going and how Niall somehow knew that the gunmen were coming for these very flats. We kept running, winding around the halls until we came to a stop in front of elevators and a stairwell. Knowing we’d be safer if we were locked away in an elevator, Niall punched the down button, causing it to turn a light orange color. As we waited, I could feel his rushing breath against my chest. He was trying to catch his breath.