Complicated Love

Chapter 3

Bucky stays away from Steve. He should feel guilty for the way he treated him but he can't seem to find the sympathy right now. It's night time and he is sitting on the cold hard ground. His room is so small with only a twin sized bed and a counter with a small lamp.

He has his knees on his chest and his eyes are closed as he thinks about Tony. He can't get rid of the feeling of their bodies close like that in the morning. He knows that if that were to happen again, he would lose it and kiss Tony right there and then.

Ugh, no! Why am I thinking about him this way? It would make more sense if he fell in love with Steve. Someone who actually cares about him. This is so complicated...

The soft knocks on his door interrupt his thoughts. He assumes its Steve so he just mumbles a small "Come in." The doorknob twists and Bucky lifts his head up, ready to apologize for his behavior today. Instead, no words come out of his mouth as Tony leans against the doorframe wearing shorts instead of pants.

None of them say a single word to each other for a good full minute.

"I'm over that Barnes," Tony admits.

Bucky tilts his head in confusion. "What?"

"I said I'm over that. I'm over what happened and I've been over it for a long time now," he replies with much more confidence.

Bucky opens his mouth to speak but finds himself with nothing to say due to the amount of confusion consuming him. He doesn't understand. Tony sees that and fumbles with his fingers.

"What you did to my parents doesn't affect me anymore. My dad never gave me the love a father should give his son. He was always distant with me. And my mom, yeah that stung a lot more than it should but I'm over it."

Bucky separates his knees and then joins them together repeatedly. He scratches the top of his head and his eyebrows join together. "I don't understand. If you were over it...then why do you act so cold towards me? Why do you hate me?" It felt so good to finally ask that question. Bucky always thought he knew the answer, but now, he just discovered that it's not it.

Tony snorts and shoots him a charming smile, causing Bucky's stomach to flutter. Tony didn't smile often and when he did, it was the most beautiful thing in the world.

"I don't hate you Winter Soldier," he says and crouches in front of him so Bucky can see his brown eyes better.

"But you-"

"Yeah but it's not because I hate you," he interrupts and raises an eyebrow.

"Then? What did I do while I wasn't in control of myself? What could I have possibly done that was worse than killing your parents?" Bucky asks urgently. Tony flinches but quickly recovers. He looks like he's battling himself over what to say. When he shrugs and grins like an idiot, Bucky frowns.

"You made me fall in love with you, you idiot," Tony says and just like that, his smile completely fades and he gets on his feet. Bucky's mouth falls open and his eyes widen as he watches Tony. He looks flustered now. His cheeks are pink and his hands curl into fists as if what he said was the wrong decision. He makes his way to the exit, ready to leave but Bucky stands up and grabs his arm. Tony looks down at the metal arm holding onto him and when he tries to yank it away, he doesn't budge.

"Let me go," he snaps.

"Tony wait," Bucky begs.

"Let me go Bucky," Tony says through clenched teeth.

"You can't just do that to me," he argues. "You can't just admit something that big and then walk away."

"I shouldn't have admitted anything in the first place,"Tony mutters. Bucky doesn't notice he's smiling until his cheeks hurt from the wide smile. With a single tug, he brings Tony against his chest and a strange sound escapes his lips.

"Bucky!" Tony whines. Bucky laughs and puts his arms around his waist. He loves how short he is compared to his super soldier body. He loves the way his cheeks are growing a deep shade of red as each second passes by. He loves the messy hair that needs to be combed badly.

Tony surprises Bucky by wrapping his arms around his neck and his fingers pull down the hair tie, releasing Bucky's hair free. For a moment, they just look at each other. Neither of them know what to do next.

"What the hell are you doing to me?" Tony asks desperately.

"I could ask you the same Stark," Bucky replies as Tony grabs a strand of his hair and twirls it around his finger.

"I've never felt so strongly about this Bucky. I've never wanted to touch or kiss somebody as much as you. You drive me insane. So insane that it makes me angry, really angry. That's why I avoid you because whenever you're near me, I feel like I'll just lose control," he says in a single breath.

Bucky's eyes widen. That's the most Tony has ever said since they've spoken and every word made his heart flutter. He moves Tony against the wall and presses his body against his. Tony breathes sharply and grips his shoulders. "Then lose it now," Bucky whispers. "Lose your control."

And Tony does. His lips meet Bucky's with such a deep and desperate force that nearly makes him lose balance. Tony has to tip toe to reach fully and he cups Bucky's face with his hands, his fingers tugging at his hair. Bucky places his own hands in Tony's messy hair, creating an even bigger mess but he doesn't mind that. That's all Bucky is good at now. He lifts Tony from the ground and he wraps his legs around Bucky's waist. They both kiss until they can't breathe. They kiss until their lips are sore.

They kiss until they forget all of their problems, as if they were never enemies to begin with.