How to Be a Butterfly (ON HOLD)

Chapter 1

Thirteen months after (Flash-Forward)

Every step I take is filled with a heavy feeling that simply can not be described. I feel like the bare cream colored walls are drawing in closer as I approach the door. Slowly reaching the large wooden door I gently turn the knob. My mind is torn into two as if I should go in but my body knows exactly what I should do. 

The room was neat and organized, filled with bags of clothes, get well gifts, and machines that keeps her life going.

My eyes land on a girl, no the girl, my eyes land on my girl.

She is laying there with her eyes closed and her chest is falling up and down. Walking towards the bed like I am walking on thin ice, I take her small pale hands in mine. Her hands are cold as ice, but I ignore it and stare at her small face. Her strawberry blonde hair  is laying around her head carefully and her skin is deathly pale. Tears rim my eyes as I look at her. All I want at the very moment is to look at her light green eyes and see her mouth form into the most beautiful smile.

Suddenly feeling weak I sit down on the chair near the bed but continue to hold her hand. My heart was aching for her that I felt like it is tearing apart from the roots.  From the day I meet her all I wanted was to make her happy, but in the process I just hurt her even more. Instead of helping her glue back her already broken self, I broke her to where it might be impossible to piece back together. Dying from the guilt and sorrow, I lean in and press my lips against her warm forehead.

"I am sorry," I whisper softly against her forehead.

Getting back up I look at her and squeeze her hand before turning around to the door. My hand lands on the cold silver knob but before I turn it I look back at the girl I have called everything from a friend to a lover laying on the hospital bed.

I memorize every inch of her face like it was some kind of puzzle I have to figure out.

I imagine her light green eyes that turn dark green when she is sad.

I hear her laugh that I would never get tired of hearing and I see her frustrated face which makes her look so adorable.

In all honesty, I would never in my life be ready to leave the girl in front of me.

She is the missing puzzle piece in my life that fit so perfectly with me. 

She's in my thoughts that makes me want to think more, she's  an angel in my dreams that makes me want to sleep more, and she's the light that makes me want to live more. 

She grew on me so fast that by the time I finally admitted I liked her I already had started loving her. 

Slowly taking my eyes off of her I open the door. I step out and turn for the last time and speak my last words to her.

"I love you."

Those were the only three words that I have said and meant deep inside my heart in my whole life. I couldn't love her for the rest of her life but I would love her for the rest of mine.

With that I walk out of the life of my universe, my everything.