Real Life

Depression-written from a personal veiw and expirence.

Depression. A word use to describe sadness. A type of sadness. It's a word so overused by so many people, it's forgotten what actual people actually feel when they actually have this deadly disease. The spectrum. Everyone is somewhere on the depression spectrum. Most people claiming they have depression, really don't. They could just not be a tremendously happy person, yet their still on the spectrum of pain and death, just not too deep. So many people do this, use this term, so when when those people that are so high on the spectrum, and have the guts to reach out for help, people shrug it off and then they don't get the help they so desperately need. Zoey and Raven. Zoey is the beautiful, small,
and the popular girl who seems to love life and everyone and everything around. Raven is the emo teenager who's tough and acts out. Stereotypes. People would think Zoey is nowhere on the depression spectrum and Raven is on the highest part. Those are stereotypes. Really, Raven is happy, and bright but has a short temper with people. Zoey is the depressed one, laughing on the outside while dying on the inside having trouble seeing herself alive a week from now. Dressed in color and smiling and prancing about. Seemingly happy. Wrong. That is just a facade she has to put up because it she was to act how she would feel she would cry, go limp, panic, cut, bleed and enjoy it, look dead, and scream. Words can't describe that depression she DOES have, feeling each day. She wonders why she still alive each day. No one understands. No one will unless they feel her pain which she nor I would NEVER wish upon another. So what does she do? She keeps it to herself and keep going, secretly planning her escape, keeping her facade up. That way no one gets hurt. THAT is depression. The feeling of being so sad you feel numb, that it's so hard-a war-to breathe another breath, take another step, or open your eyes again every time you blink. It's basically the feeling of death but a million times worse, so why won't they let her end the pain and finish the job? She starves and harms herself because pains the only thing that reminds her she's still human so why not? Lying awake at night, never getting sleep and the only times you do it's from crying yourself to sleep, because the voices in your head and they thoughts in your brain, eating at you. To they point where your so disgusted in your self that you cringe at every compliment you get and want to break the mirror at the sight of that thing-that monster-staring back at you. So what do you do? You relieve the pain.