jail cell // l.t.

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Harry || Entry 2

My vision became blurry as tears formed in my eyes from watching my boyfriend lie bleeding on the hospital bed. His voice could barely form words as he tried to speak to me, before he left forever and I would be able to hear his angelic voice again. It was devastating to know that in a short matter of time, every little thing of his that I fell in love with, my five senses wouldn't register anymore. His blue eyes that were always intoxicating and bright, his angelic voice, the soft touch of his fingertips, the taste of his sweet lips, and the smell of him every time I woke up in the morning.

Everything about this was wrong. Tomorrow was supposed to be the day I finally confessed to him how crazy in love I was with him and propose. The ring was inside one of my socks in our little nightstand, and some insane girl decides to shoot him. How fucked up is that?

My ears perked as I heard him whisper my name out in a raspy voice, "Harry...". It was slow and barely audible, and it was then that I could tell that he was much closer to his death than I wanted him to be. How could the world's most perfect person in the entire world who had so much going for them, die at such a young age. My mind floods back to when we sang Forever Young. If only that wish was granted then I could still have Niall.

Louis had already previously left the room in a pissed off mood, but all of us knew better than to go after him. He just needed some time alone to recover from this, just like I needed to. But never would I miss a second of the very few I had to be away from Niall. I wanted to be the last thing he sees when he closes his eyes.

"Yes baby?" I asked as he lifted his hand up and wiped away a stray tear that I hadn't known escaped. Everything in the room was silent except for the beating of the heart monitor. Oh how I would give up my life so he could live, but I've tried to many times to do that. I suggested to the doctors to take my blood and somehow give it to him. It didn't make sense to me or anyone, but I was desperate. Losing the love of your life is the most difficult thing to ever experience and it just drives you insane.

"Don't forge me, please. I love you and the boys so much and I wouldn't take back anything. I'm glad I'm dying if it means I get to experience my love with you even if it was for a short period of time. Please read the journal, you and the boys. I love you Harry," he breathed out as he held onto my hand tightly.

"I love you Niall, I promise-," I was cut off the by the sound of his heart monitor going flat while his eyes fluttered closed. That was it. I lost everything I've ever loved, and there was no way I would be able to have him again. There is no more One Direction, not without Niall. There is no Niall anymore. I let out a loud series of cries as the doctors stopped and pulled their bloody hands away. Why wasn't anything enough to save him?

I curled into a bawl against the tile floor as I weeped to Niall's death.