|| SwaRon SS: Unrequited love. ||

Part 4

I was firmly rooted; legs became heavy, my whole body weight was now flooded in my legs. It anchored me at the door of our bedroom. I waited and I waited for long to see her taking the first step, she was stubborn she didn't move, she was in her own world with a diary, something precious than me. Despite her best friend, I didn't know she has a habit of writing a diary.

I was numb when I heard those lines from her. I know she loves me, in fact, I just realized that in the cafe but hearing it from the person was so different. I stood there for more than one minute. When I know she was not going to move I forced my legs from there, not towards she, just away from her, I have to talk to her but before that I need to know what I want, I want to set my priorities. Always Sharon helped me in those difficult situations now I need something else to rely upon, I went towards my studio I need to dance.

"If you could use dance for clearing your frustration, then why did you use Sharon last night."

Someone told me from the back of my head, he managed to slap right across my face, I frowned. Why has he to be right every time? I hated to admit it. He always took Sharon's side, but he never went wrong. Everything he said was right. Even I was not sure why did I use Sharon for controlling my hurt. I flinched at the thought of using her.

"If you are feeling this low then how would have she felt about it."

Here we go again. My subconscious was eating me up. I wished the earth could swallow me fully. I don't want to face anything.

"That will prove you as a loser."

Haa I was a loser who didn't even have any idea about what was happening in his life. I felt like a mess...I was the most complicated mess... I admit I was wrong.. Nevertheless, my intentions were not wrong.

After he heard me, he went to hibernation, didn't talk at all and I was more than happy for that...

I put one CD in the player and I danced, my passion... one thing that connected Sharon and me, we were the dancing couple in our college. I danced until I couldn't move even a bit, I felt sore; my muscles were tightening against my flesh. My whole body was red. I was sweating, my t-shirt was dripping wet. Sweat drops were falling from my head that trickled through my forehead and my eyes and then it went through my cheeks, my neck and then disappeared inside my t-shirt. I felt cold. My veins were numb. My head was numb. I couldn't see anything. All I could see was Sharon's smiling face, she was laughing inside my head. That broke one smile on my face. I smiled after hours, I felt peace.

I took off my t-shirt and lay on that floor. It was cold and I needed that, the songs were continuously playing in the stereo I didn't mind to turn off that, that were Sharon favorites numbers and mine too. I laid there with closed eyes; though my eyes were closed, I could see Sharon, her smiling face.

I don't know how much time has passed, when I heard the door being locked, I went to downstairs and Sharon was going for work. First, I thought to read her diary but I was scared, what if she doesn't like it. Still I made my mind, just try it, I went to our bedroom and took a long cold shower after that I searched the whole room, in closet, in the cupboards, everywhere, for her diary, but I couldn't find it. She has hid that, I felt angry on myself, with a heavy heart, I sat on the same place where Sharon was sitting some minutes ago. Suddenly something fell down from the top of the cupboard, I reached near that in a wind speed and took that in my hand. That was a photo of Sharon and me. My eyes went to the top of the cupboard, there was a box, I remembered once Sharon has warned me to not to check the box, and after that I almost forgot about it. A sudden urge crept inside me to look inside of that, very carefully I took that and placed on my bed. My body was shivering when I saw her diary inside it. I took that out and opened it with trembling hands.