Hold Me Tight, And Don't Let Go (On Hold)

Chapter 21: Lips Of An Angel

I could here voices but I wasn't exactly sure if I was hallucinating or if they were real. I didn't know if sane was in me or if I was insane. Darkness surrounded me and I couldn't see anything. The voices were the only thing that kept me company. But they aren't pure, mellifluous voices. They were frantic; filled with worry and hurt. I wondered why they were hurt. What had happened to make them hurt. I could feel there bleeding hearts within mine.

"...will be okay." The voice was heavy and ruff, like an old man. I had never heard that voice before and I didn't like it. "She's in a slight-"

"Dr. Reninalds, " This voice was a voice of a woman, with a thick accent. It sounded familiar but I couldn't bring myself to figure who it was behind it. " don't try to beat around the bush here. A coma is a coma. What are the chances of her waking up?"

"You have a good chance of her waking up, but don't get your hopes up." His footsteps started and began fading away. I heard a door open and then close.

Then there was a sigh. " Its been two weeks since the accident, she should be awake by now. "

"She will wake up when its time, Mom."

"Josh..."

"I honestly don't need your worry right now, I'm trying not to think about it. " His voice was in a deep whisper. "I already have to deal with Michael."

Michael? Why was Michael here?

"Where is he?"

" Down stairs with Jacob, he's been crying since he heard. He's afraid he's going to lose Tes, too."

I heard a long sad sigh. " It will only get worse when she wakes up and understand what happened."

"Don't, don't remind me. I'm not ready, she will be so hurt."

She was crying now." She didn't even have him for long..."

I was confused. The voices made no sense to me. What were they talking about? Who didn't I have for long. My head wouldn't allow me to think for long. I was soon distracted again by the voices. " What about the funeral?"

"Anne, we aren't thinking about that right now!" he retorted. He sounded extremely frustrated.

" I know but-"

"Please, just stop, the anxiety of all of this is enough. Its bad enough Kelsi went into labor earlier than she was suppose to, now Theresa is in a coma and I will probably have to be the one to tell her the news. Her expression will probably be more painful than that phone call was to Michael."

"I understand all that. I think the anxiety is killing all of us, Joshua. She hasn't been able to forgive me yet for what I've done. If something happened to her I would never get over this guilt."

"You won't ever get her forgiveness by the way that you have been approaching her these past few years. You've only caused her more confusion and she doesn't know how to deal with that. Don't you know she gave up being a psychiatrist because of you? She felt like a hypocrite and thought she was lying to all of her patients. She told me that she couldn't sit there and help people with all their problems when she didn't know how to deal with her own. That is why she went on tour with Michael after you came, to escape you. You can't think that just by introducing her to her father and her sister that she would just forget all that had happened.  She's been wanting answers from you for years now."

" Its not exactly something that I can easily explain..." She said

" You owe it to her, Ma. You owe it to all of us. And for the sake of Luther. I've already forgiven you, but Kelsi, Jacob, and Theresa had not. If you continue throwing your husband in her face, your only driving her away."

There was a brief silence. The only sound I could here was of beeping. Annoying beeping that made my ears ring.

" I guess that's why she moved to California," she said in a faint whisper." to run away from it all.  She's happier when she's with Michael. "

" She loves him more than you would know. She said that she would never betray him the way you betrayed Luther. She couldn't cause Luther that much pain."

"Do you have to make me feel bad?" His words sounded like they hurt her.

"Its the truth."

She sighed once more and I heard her stand up." I suppose you're right."

"Where are you going?"

" To check on Selena."

Who the hell is Selena?

"Mmm."

The sound of the door shutting told me that she was gone. The room fell quiet again and there wasn't really much being said. The beeping was the only thing that spoke to me.

Beep Beep Beep....

Minutes went by and I was still staring into darkness. The silence was killing me, I wanted to hear more. I don't want to allow myself to claim the insane at that moment.

Beep Beep Beep Beep.....

More moments passed by. I suddenly could feel pain in my neck and in my chest. It was minor pain but I could feel it. I wanted to take my mind off it but there was nothing that could distract me. I was lost in that darkness. I decided to search for the light.

Standing up, I glanced around at nothing. What was I suppose to do? Which way was I suppose to go?  Where was I suppose turn? Every where I looked there was nothing but darkness, nothing but nothing. So I walked. Keeping straight I just walked....

During my walking to nothing I heard the door open again. I wasn't exactly sure how many minutes, seconds that had gone by but I knew it had to have been a while. The steps were short before stopping and sitting down somewhere close by." How are doing, man?" Josh asked.

"I'm coping," This voice made my heart accelerate. It was so sweet and soft." She's so still, I'm not uses to seeing her like this."

"Neither am I, I'm hoping she wakes up soon, though. The only improvement she has made us the fact that she is breathing on her own."

" I knew I should've gone with her...nine if thus would have happened."

"You had no way of knowing,"

" I told her I didn't feel comfortable with her coming here by herself, I should've followed my instincts."

"Yeah, how are you coping knowing that he's gone?"

The sigh that escaped his lips pierced through my heart. I didn't like it." I don't know. Its hard grieving with all this worry if her, my mind clouded I'm still having a hard time excepting it."

"It will get better, Mike, I promise."

I felt something touch my hand. When I looked down there was nothing there." Terri," His voiced echoed through the darkness." If you're in there, if you can hear me please come back to me. I can't live without you. Give me a sign. Tell me that you can here me."

I felt something soft rest upon my forehead.

"Come back to me baby..."

I smiled. With that said I continued walking in the dark, in hopes the I would find the voice that came from the lips of an angel.