Friends with benefits. Jeon Jeongguk

One

He doesn't remember the day he had fallen in love with you, but he remembered the day when he held your hand in bed and realised how much it would hurt to let go. And sometimes it hurts him to look at you, because looking at you makes him realise that losing you is something he would never be able to recover from.

His favourite thing in the world is when you fall asleep on him, body melting into every curve of his and everything is skin and cloth and heartbeats and warm and safe. He wants to sleep with you more, and no, he doesn't mean sex. He means sleep together, under the sheets with your head on his chest and sleepy, blissful silence. When he lays in bed thinking about you, he starts smiling because he's just so in love with you.

Jeongguk remembers your first and second meeting so vividly.

"Why aren't you kissing me yet?" He had asked you  as you sat at the bar twirling the straw in your cup of water mindlessly. You shuffled in your stool uncomfortably, avoiding the gaze of the guy you'd heard tons of things about. Some would say that he's the "epitome of sex", "biggest mistake of your life" or others, simply the "worst playboy you'd come across."

"I'm not interested in you, or kissing you." You bluntly reply as you take a sip of your water, eyes watching the level of the water in your cup decrease. In your peripheral vision, you saw him attractively licking his bottom lips, now aware of how dangerous he was to you.

"I got it. You're a lesbian, aren't you?" His spoken words almost make you choke on and spit out your water, but your self-control swallows it quickly.

"No, I am definitely not!" You retorted, cheeks flushing a furious scarlet.

"Then prove it and kiss me." He smirked, leaning closer to take in your sweet scent.

You flinch backwards. "I know what they say about you."

"Is that so?" He breaks into an infamous smile that makes you feel less tense. "What do they say about me? Is it that once you've had me in bed, you're never going back? That every girl is addicted to me instantly?"

"Every girl? You sure sound so sure of yourself." You nod slowly and take another sip of your water to break the eye contact reasonably.

"Want to try?" He smirked at you, making you awkwardly clench your teeth together. "Or too scared to take up the challenge because you know you'll be addicted?"

—

That next morning, after he smiled so charmingly in his sleep, you knew that you blew it. He was so right you wanted to slam your fist in his oh-so-perfect face. Fighting against your right sanity, you pulled a pink post it note from your bag and rushed down your number and a few words before he woke up.

This was my first one-night stand, sorry if I didn't do too well. [ insert number ]

He'd scrunched the note up when he woke up to find it on the kitchen counter, scrambling it into his shorts. "Not only does she not know how one-night stands work, but she expects me to believe that this was her first one-night stand. Pathetic." But it really was, your first one-night stand.

Just little did he know, when he was laying in bed that night, remembering the way you tried to cover your rose-coloured cheeks every time he complimented you during the intercourse or the slow rise of your chest as your lightly breathed during your sleep that, that couldn't be the last time you'd be meeting.

—

On the second night when you both laid in a tired yet comfortable silence, you were too afraid to sleep. You always slept alone in your apartment, holding both your hands until you slept with a night light on, however the warm figure beside in the darkness you kept you awake, finally you could take advantage of sleeping with someone.

You shifted on the bed, scooting a little closer to him and searched for his hand aimlessly, accidentally skimming your fingers over his toned stomach before finding his hand just beside him, lacing your fingers together.

"What are you doing?" Jeongguk's voice cut through the golden silence, and at times like this you would have probably just began rambling and end up cursing yourself until you reached home again, but you were too tired today.

"I'm scared." You said honestly.

"Of what?"

"If I told you," you grew more tired as you spoke. "I would be even more scared. So please, just let me hold your hand tonight."

>> hello idk what this is but it made me pissed so i had to write it