Anchor

Chapter Two

John

The morning after a large drinking session was something no one could get used to, groaning John managed to sit himself up from the bed as his surroundings swirled around him like he was on a merry go round. The temporary numbness which had eased him had disappeared and he was now left with a broken heart and a sore head

Hair of the dog

Something Arthur always recommends after a night out. Closing his eyes the memory of Esmes betrayal played in his mind like a movie. Her giving birth after another one of their screaming matches, him waiting at Lotte's pub with his brothers im eager anticipation for the arrival of his new boy, Lotte walking in and giving him the news which knocked his knees from beneath him, the baby was Chinese. John would later learn when he and his brothers would leave for business Esme would sneak to the mans house with no regard to anything other than her own needs.

The marriage had been one of convenience, nothing more than a parlay between two feuding families to stop the blood flowing in the streets. This was something John had to keep thinking, he wasn't fooling anyone, his family saw his heartbreak, his anger. John was starting to get the reputation of being unstable, reckless and bloodthirsty as every fight he had the other person would leave with cuts and blood pouring from their faces as John took great pleasure in using his trusty razor blades which were always on his cap.

He didn't feel much these days, no happiness no hope the pain would ease. When he lost his first wife the pain never ended it was dulled to a pain in his chest as the years went by but he would always love Martha.

God takes the best first Polly always says something which did nothing to ease his heartbreak. Apart from pain and anger John felt guilty to be away from his children who no doubt asked where their father was. Shaking his head to keep the tears at bay he managed to dress himself and head to the Garrison.

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After leaving London John decided for the time being to stay in Birmingham. Dispite the protests of his family, who had all stayed in London, he wanted to be alone, he needed to handle the business from this side of the river alone.

The pub was quite as he entered only ten men occupied the seats. Walking to the bar he spotted Harry who was already pouring him a large scotch

"On the house Mr Shelby"

Nodding he watched Harry move away bringing his attention to the new barmaid. She was a pretty thing, brown hair which was pinned up, long thin blue dress which stopped at her knees, her skin was flawless yet John noted as he saw her hands the skin was slightly cracked around the palms which told him she was a worker. Tipping his drink back he spoke to her

"Another one luv"

Blue eyes met his as she grabbed the glass and poured him another drink

"Don't think I've seen you around before"

"I just moved here" her voice was husky and smooth like silk

"Where from?"

She brought him his drink "London"

In a strange way the woman reminded him of Lotte, Tommy's wife, his old crush. She held herself a way a woman should, shoulders back, standing straight, a dress which should be both pretty yet appropriate and yet she had a fire about her. He could tell she was a no nonsense woman who knew what she wanted.

"So what brings you at this time in the morning" she wiped the bar as she spoke

"Hangover, what brings you to Birmingham? Would have thought a pretty lass like you would have some high rise husband in London"

Grinning she replied "no I moved here for a fresh start with my younger siblings"

"Parents?"

She shrugged and poured me another drink. So no parents he thought

The more he drank the more he spoke. The day turned to night and John now sat alone with the woman, Harry was in the back. He was telling the woman over his problems with Esme

"So I divorced her" he chuckled humorously

"How are your kids handling that?"

He shrugged "don't know, they're back with my family in London"

Looking up from his drink he noticed a look across the womans face which was a mixture of disbelief and disgust "your problems are your problems, your a father who is so self absorbed with his own feelings you can't push past them to look after your own kids"

Rage bubbled indide him "you can't talk to me like that, your just a fucking barmaid"

"A fucking barmaid who had got more balls than you" she hissed

The pub was so quiet you could hear a pin drop John was absolutely shocked the woman spoke to him like that

"So your wife cheated on you, your not the first you won't be the last. other halfs will come and go they will fall in love with you and you will love them in return and then hate you and rip your heart out. But the only love which will last is the love of your children who no doubt fawn over you"

Heartbreak, the fucking feelings were back and any alchol he had ingested was quickly washed away from her words. She was right

"So pick yourself up, stop feeling sorry for yourself and go see your kids"

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It took him all night until the early hours of the morning but he finally arrived in London. His kids were staying with Tommy and Lotte for the time being.

Making his way into the giant house he spotted some of the maids who recognised him and gave him a little bow.

"Do yoy know where my kids are?"

Nodding one of the women showed him up to the second floor and down the long corridor

"They're in here sir, will you ve staying for breakfast?"

He nodded slowly

"I'll set something up for you" she quickly walked away leaving him in the empty hallway. He suddenly felt nervous, what if they hated him now? With his fingers on the door handle he played the woman's voice through his head

Stop feeling sorry for yourself, and go and see your kids.

Taking a deep breath he opened the door and saw his kids sleeping peacefully in the beds. He shrugged out of his coat and placed his cap on the chair.

They were both sleeping peacefully in their own beds and suddenly John felt the tears escape his eyes

My boys

He walked to the bed and smiled. Toby was sleeping on his front, mouth wide open and snoring softly while Max cuddled his pillow like it was another person. He shifted and opened his eyes "dad?"

"Hey little man"

Max quickly got up and hugged his father who was now on his knees embracing his son. John clenched his eyes shut and felt his chest tighten he opened his eyes when he felt another small body embrace his. Both of his boys were hanging on to him tightly

"I'm so sorry boys, I'll never leave you like that again I promise"