Not Gay (Sherlock x John)

2. Isolation

JOHN POV-

Light shines through the crack in the curtains at the hotel. I get up and open the blinds squinting at the outside. Clouds cover the sky, although it doesn't really look like it is going to rain.

Ever since the war I never thought I would go through something harder... I guess I was wrong. The two people I care about can't even help me now, not that Sherlock is ever that much help.

I go outside and grab a newspaper from the stand. Flipping through the pages I see yet another article about the case Sherlock has been working on. I'm not quite sure why he's so interested in this one, I haven't been around much due to everything that has been going on with Mary.

I analyze the article, force of habit now I guess. Looks like something he would be interested in, clever murderer, targeting seemingly intelligent people. At every crime scene there is the word Sherlock somewhere among the victims possessions, it could be a coincidence but clearly Sherlock doesn't think so. I hope he's ok, he should be, he always has been.

I don't even know why I worry about him, I shouldn't, I really shouldn't at a time like this. Unfortunately there isn't much I have to think about, my life has been spent mostly with Sherlock. My days mainly consist of solving crimes and writing my blog maybe I'll spend more time at work like a normal person. Right now I don't want to.

I try to sit still and relax but it puts me more on edge than I already am. I'll go to work, I need to prove to myself I can do something without Sherlock, I'm a doctor and I'm good at my job so I'm going to work.

I leave the hotel and grab a cab, I'd walk but I don't want to run into him. I get to my office and sit down, preparing for the day ahead of me. The loud ticking of the clock constantly there as I take patient after patient. Every time someone comes in it doesn't feel right, it simply becomes boring.

After 5 tedious hours I head home... well back to the hotel I guess. I cover the window with the curtains and sit hunched up in the corner, on my computer. I go onto my blog and start to write, it takes me a while before I realize I don't actually have anything to write about. I wonder if Sherlock has found someone else to assist him on his case, maybe Irene Adler. After all he does like her, he must, he is human after all.

I don't even understand why he likes her. She just goes around trying to seduce other men, apparently stuff like that works on Sherlock...

The musty hotel air fills my lungs as I try and relax, why is this so hard. My breathing is  staggered but I'm not even mad, I'm not going to waste my time being mad at the jerk with the hat. He even thinks it's cool when he pulls up his jacket to hide his cheek bones and be all mysterious, doesn't even look that good.

Finding myself with nothing to do or think about I go to bed. That night is filled with nightmares and plenty of other dreams. The same thing night after night and my days continue to be constant and boring.