❝ Halloweenish Town ❞ -Gravity Falls Goretober One Shots 2017

day 7- with a knife

hit me with the memes, Dis 😂😂👏🏻

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Dipper stood at the kitchen counter, chopping some celery on the cutting board before him. He smirked as he cut them into small pieces, feeling determined he was going to dominate.

Ford, Mabel, and Dipper all take part in their daily dinner-off. Each member of the Pines family switches off nights to cook dinner and if the food tastes better than the others, they're out of chores for a few days. Stan automatically became the judge of their meals as Ford had made up a rule that "old men who stole their brother's identity and gotten kicked out of multiple states couldn't participate." In Ford's defense, Stan's food would generally make them all sick.

Mabel made some classic spaghetti and meatballs for dinner last night and Dipper had a strong feeling that his meatloaf and fresh salad would destroy her sauced noodles.

He heard the vending machine open behind him and he continued slicing, grabbing a few baby tomatoes to chop now, too. Ford's footsteps echoed through the living room as it sounded like they were coming this way and Dipper whirled around, standing in front of his cutting board. "You know the rules, Grunkle Ford," he shouted before Ford walked in. "You can't see until dinner's served."

Ford's head peeked around the corner of the doorway, looking in at Dipper with a broad grin. "Think you can beat my chicken pot pie?" He asked, an eyebrow raised.

"I know I could," Dipper laughed nonchalantly and waved a hand dismissively. "Now go before I tattle to Stan that you were cheating."

Ford shook his head, chuckling softly, turning and heading upstairs. Dipper waited until the sound of the creaky steps vanished before he turned back around to his vegetables. He furrowed his brow. Where'd his knife go...?

He looked around the counter for it, his eyes narrowed. He glanced all around his dinner ingredients and even checked on the floor. But it was nowhere to be found. Dipper sighed, shaking his head as he grabbed another knife from the drawer and turned back to his salad.

"You're not going to win," a voice murmured in the back of Dipper's head, it's voice gentle.

Dipper scrunched up his nose, slicing the lettuce from the head a bit quicker as he tried to ignore it.

"Why do you even bother?" It cooed softly, a slight breeze on the back of Dipper's neck, sending chills down his spine.

"Gee, I don't know," he snapped back in an annoyed whisper, feeling more mad than scared. "Maybe because I'm trying to do some nice quality bonding with my family without someone coming in and messing my life up again."

The voice was silent for quite a period of time that Dipper thought it had left. Though he was proven wrong a moment later when it spoke up again.

"If you're one to talk, what does that make you?"

Dipper stood there in puzzlement for a moment, not sure how to approach the question. He pinched the bridge of his nose, shaking his head. "That doesn't make any sense."

"I'm sure it does," the voice countered, its tone growing slighter distorted. "You just aren't thinking about it."

"Again," Dipper snapped back with a huff, cutting again irritably. "I'd rather not think of literally anything except chopping this salad, okay?"

"YoUr LoSs," the disembodied voice laughed before it disappeared, an essence seeming to appear behind Dipper and the boy grit his teeth to keep from screaming in annoyance. He slowly turned, glaring daggers at the small triangle before him.

"Bill..." He greeted coldly, his jaw clenched, gripping onto the knife handle tightly. "So help me..."

The yellow demon just laughed in response. "Help you?!" He sniggered in that obnoxious tone of his. "Why, that would be doing you a favor and why on Earth would I do that?"

Dipper closed his eyes for a moment, trying to steal himself and keep his patience.

"Look, if all you're here to do is hurt me," he snapped, his hands on his hips and he kept the knife angled away from him. "I'd rather you wait until a little later. Maybe, I don't know... After dinner? Then you can have the joy of making me throw up all the food I just digested."

Bill tapped his bow tie, his arms crossed. "As fun as that sounds," he sighed airily, making it sound like he wanted nothing more than to do what the boy had just offered up. "I'm on a tight schedule. You're not my only client, you know. I terrorize people all over the place. So, I'm afraid, we'll just have to work something in right now."

Dipper's shoulders were tense and even though he should be petrified, he was really just ticked off. "Fantastic, let's get this over with."

Bill rolled his eye. "See, it's not supposed to work that way," he told him, floating a circle around his head before going back to the position in front of him. "Wouldn't you rather be making your salad or pulling out your probably burning meatloaf from the oven?"

"Oh, I would like that more than the world," Dipper spat out, his eyes flashing. "But sadly, I can't."

"How come?" Bill taunted, as he seemed to be enjoying himself, his eye glinting mischievously.

"Because you did me a pleasure and showed up," Dipper argued, giving Bill the entertainment he craved. The preteen was literally shaking. Probably with fury. "Of course you had just to show up tonight. Right when we're actually doing some fun family stuff, you pop in to screw my life up yet again! And it's really starting to bug me that you think your times' more important than mine, got it? You're freaking immortal! You have as much time on your hands as you could possibly want! And that just annoys the heck out of me, alright?! I hate you!" With his final sentence, hissed at Bill in a louder tone than he would've liked, he flung the knife right at the demon, but the triangle had disappeared before it hit him.

"Quite a temper." Bill reappeared beside Dipper, eyeing the wall with a knife wedged into it, his arms crossed. "I pity that wall," he commented bluntly. "But I bet you envy it."

"I-- what?" Dipper growled incredulously, glaring at Bill in pure annoyance. "Dude, what are you even talking about?"

Bill sighed. "I bet sometimes you wish you had a knife pried directly into your chest, huh?"

Dipper stared at him, gaping slightly. "Uh, no, actually. Believe it or not, no matter how bad my life sucks, I never wish I was dead!"

Bill floated there for a moment, his gaze still on the wall. "And what a shame that is," he muttered after a moment, looking to Dipper as half a dozen knifes surrounded him in the air, inching closer.

"You know, back when I was first starting out as a dream demon trainee, I used to hate torturing or hurting innocent people," Bill told him, his expression unreadable. Dipper scoffed. "But I've sorta grown numb to the feeling," he went on, ignoring Dipper. "So I always figure, 'What's a few more?'" Then he laughed, snapping his fingers, sending the knives right at him as Dipper let out a terrified yelp, the oven timer alerting the meatloaf was done cooking.

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