“I inherited a painting and a violin which turned out to be a Rembrandt and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately, Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius was a terrible painter.”
--Tommy Cooper
If you managed to aquire an expensive violin, the author bestows upon you many congratulations. This was certainly a difficult task, she must admit.
After the purchase of a well-crafted violin, you must make sure you have the following as well: a bow, rosin, a shoulder rest, and Swedish fish. I can hear you asking already: Why do I need all these items? More money out of my pocket? I'm nearly broke, and <insert celebrity name> is angry because I stole his/her credit card! Be patient! If you did steal the celebrity's credit card, after all, they shouldn't have been able to figure out who did steal it; if they did, you wouldn't be sitting here reading this. Pure logic. But to answer your other question: Unless you want to play pizzicato (finger plucking), you will need a bow to create that smooth sound. Without the rosin, however, the bow will sound ratty (no matter how expensive). The shoulder rest, on the other hand, supports your shoulder (no surprise there) while you play the violin. And the Swedish fish? Tribute to me, the author, of course!
However, this is only the first step of your 100 mile journey to success! For your first centimeter of the journey, we must learn the different parts of the violin.
What is the most important part of the violin? Haha, trick question! There is no "most important" piece in the violin.
First, let's start with the small ornaments. And if you can't remember what they are later in this (super-duper, extremely helpful) manual, "don't sweat the small stuff" because you can always turn back!
At the bottom of the violin, you may see a black or dark-brown (depending on the quality of the instrument) oblong, oval shape. If you cheated and peeped at the image on the side, you should see that this is...(dun dun dun!) a chin rest. As the name should suggest, this is where you put your head while playing the violin.
If you glance even a mere few seconds at your violin, you will notice that it is connected to another black (or dark-brown) piece, which has 1-4 silver things protruding from it (sh...if you cheated and have seen the picture on the right, don't say anything yet! The name of the silver items will be reviewed later) This ornament is called the tailpiece. Although strangely named (does it look like a tail? I actually thought it looked like a foot!!), it is essential to the sound of the instrument.
www.follandviolins.com/articles/tailpiece:
"A tailpiece that is too light can interact negatively with the instrument’s patterns of vibration and contribute to wolf notes. A tailpiece that is matched with the instrument (usually one whose pitch does not interfere with the pitch of the body of the instrument) can give more warmth, body, and color to the sound and will help dampen wolf notes."
Asleep yet? POP QUIZ TIME! Muh ha ha ha. Any use of cellphones or other electronics for this quiz is prohibited. Please mark your answers in #2 Pencil, and if needed, review previous information.
Pop Quiz
1. Which composer is renowned for composing the song, "Liebesfreud"?
A. That's not a song.
B. Franz Liszt
C. Liebes
D. Other: _________________________
2. When do most people learn to play the violin?
A. at 100 years old
B. any time! Even a Squib like Mr. Filch can play.
C. at 1 years old
D. Who cares? Classical music is dying anyways.
3. What should you put in your violin to make it sound better?
A. Spaghetti
B. Dampeners
C. Voldemort
D. Water is the solution for everything.
Times up! Did you get the questions right?
1. 8 2. Z 3. ~
(Actual answers: B, B, B! Haha)
Oh man! It seems that only 0.1% of all participants of this pop quiz have gotten 3/3. Truly, you must study harder, fellow affluents!
Due to your low grades on this quiz (99.9% of you got 0.000/3) we must go back to... parts of the violin. After the tailpiece you surely must noticed the nail-like slivers poking out from the violin. What is that? FINE TUNERS! :D :D Those miniscule little tuners can alter the sound of the violin, from in tune...to out of tune. However, their companions, the mighty pegs (which are the 4 black things at the top of the violin) usually are more effective in making a BIG difference in sound...why, because they are BIG, whereas the SMALL tuners make a SMALL difference. Cool huh? OK, maybe not that cool.
The next thing you should see are the 4 silver slivers coming off the tailpiece. These are strings, and you play on them. In fact, you can try plucking them right now, but don't cut them because they are EXTREMELY important when playing the violin. You can't even play without them. For good measure, the names of the strings are (respectively, from thickest to lowest) G, D, A, E. You can remember by the awesome acronym: Giggling Dogs, Angry Eels.
The strings are supported by a wooden item called a...what do you think it's called? Why, a canal! Oh, just kidding, but close enough. It's a bridge! Be careful: If the bridge moves, your strings will become extremely out of tune and make weird noises!
Across from the bridge is black block where you put your fingers...called the fingerboard! As you can probably infer, you must place your singers on the fingerboard to play notes.
........Fingers.
The author suggests you now review the previous content. Quiz on Parts of the Violin on Thursday! Class dismissed.
YOU ARE READING
A Wealthy Man's Guide to Playing the Violin Well
Non-FictionA, er, wealthy man's guide to having skills at the violin. Proven effective out of the 1 man tested. ;) Read this manual for only $0.00 on WattPad! Thanks to xPeanutBrittlex for the cover. :)
