six

black

oct. 31
6:52 pm
________________________________

black isn't just a color, a shade, its a feeling.

a feeling that represents nothingness, emptiness, hopelessness; a kind of vacancy.

I've felt this way for awhile now.

but it's gotten worse since you faded away.

I'm experiencing a whole new kind of dark.

and its making my scared.

scared that i'll never feel the way you made me feel ever again.

scared that i'll never see or hear from you again.

I don't want to believe that this is really over.

i don't want to think about someone else's hands touching you.

i don't want to think of someone else's words making you smile,

blush, laugh and do that thing with your arm.

i don't want to think of someone else kissing you randomly, all over, just like i did.

but i guess it's okay.

but no one will love you like i do.

I'll love you forever.

because you are the love of my life.

everything i want and need.

if i ever truly find love again, i don't think it'll be near as great.

i don't even think I'm capable.

I'm still gonna get those tattoos. and I'm still gonna get Brady 2.0.

i hope you find your way back to me someday.