The Poor Unlucky Girl

Entry (4)

Nothing has really happened today... I tried to get closer to Wendy. It did not turn out so well, that's all that needs to be said. Changing the subject now... Um... Am I the only one who is afraid of the dark, but for different reasons? I'm not scared of what I don't see. Its what I DO see in the blackness. l have learned that because monsters have been appearing in my mind, I cannot:

1. Close my eyes for more than ten seconds.

2. Be in total silence

3. Both at the same time.

and 4. Have something near that will make random, sudden sounds.

(When talked to about these problems client responded with the following.

"When I can't see I can make them out in my mind and they usually surround me and I can just tell that they want to harm me. When I can't hear anything I hear their laughing and screaming in my ears. Random sudden sounds just scare me but then I get defensive and paranoid and do not respond well with other noises..")

Do you just hate it when you constantly hear screaming in your head? I know I do! (a cute laughing face was drawn here) I did learn how to drive them out of my mind for a while. If I listen to music loud enough to where I cannot hear anything, they are not on my mind at all!! It only works for a few hours, but usually the issue is resolved by that time. I know I haven't talked much about anyone lately. Mr. Jason was moved away..

Apparently I wasn't the only one getting bit!! I will miss him though. He may have wanted to eat me as dessert, which of course I have to be dessert. I'm far too special to be a simple meal or just a snack! Wendy has been warming up to. She whispered to me that I'm the only one being nice to her. I'm sure the doctors are nice to her as they are to me. Why wouldn't they be? Maybe one day she can join me and Emily and run around the courtyard. She could join us in a game we made called 'Spin and Break'! Its were you join hands with whoever else is with you. Spin around really fast, then let go. Let's just say I've gotten a few of my dresses dirty from the sand on the ground. Definitely worth all the laundry.

(Note: This my seem like a children's game, since she never did face the real world, she never really  grew up.)

Miss Maria has been gone for a while now. I do wonder where she has gone. I miss her very much, she, as I stated before, is like family to me. Probably my only friend that is a nurse and/or doctor. All the other doctors and nurses don't quite treat me the same as she does.

(Note: Nurse Maria, or Miss Maria, as she called her, had not been feeling well at the time. After 2 weeks of being bed ridden, she started coughing and throwing up an odd black substance, and large brown spots appeared on her skin. Its a disease no one has ever seen before, so we decided to keep it hidden from the public. Eventually, though, she died from the disease, but that's a few entries later.)

Maybe I'll never know what that word meant... Oh well! Can't know everything! Right?

Anyway, I'm getting sleepy, probably those pil-

(End of Entry 4)