an: kayo nang bahala kung anong gusto niyong title. wala ako maisip eh. hanggang crush nalang talaga. this story is short lang po :)))
an again: dedicated to SweetishHeart_ :)))
an again: from the one who sent this to me. the one and only, someone:
hi po. alam kong hindi mo to mababasa. but i want to share my feelings eh. geh bye.
/start/
Dear Kuya,
hi. gusto ko tong sabihin sayo dahil sembreak na naman and we'll not see each other for a week. but i cant. wala akong confidence. baka maging awkward pa tayo. i planned to say this to you, sabi ko sa sarili ko, magagawa ko. pero hindi pala.
so dati, i admired you. maybe happy crush lang but idc because you still have a crush on a certain someone. Noon.
then, you said na you dont have feelings for her na, I didn't believe you dahil like almost 2 or 3 months mo na atang siyang crush.
tas parang ang bilis nalang nawala ang feelings mo for her. parang you dont know what "crush" really means. and love. tapos sabi mo na nagkaroon ka na ng bagong crush then you gave clues, medyo alam ko na na ako yun but i didn't care that much. kasi, di mo pa naman sinasabi eh. i dont want to assume things rin naman, well, kahit halata na.
and then pinipilit kita na sabihin na sakin kung sino ba talaga crush mo, sabi mo palagi, bukas bukas bukas.
pinilit ko kaibigan ko na sabihin na sakin kung sino ba talaga crush mo, she told me. infront of you. wala na akong magawa. i just said okay and umalis na ako.
aaminin ko, medyo na-awkwardan ako nung moment nayun. sino ba naman diba? later that afternoon, chinat kita, tinanong kita if it's true. you said yes. so like, na-flattered ako nun dahil first time ko na may mag-ka crush sakin, which is, naging close ko and medyo naturing ko na rin na 'boy bestfriend.' i asked you why you liked me. sabi mo dahil palagi kitang binibigyan ng mga advice tungkol diyan sa certain someone mo. i really think na you dont know what crush really means. nagdadalawang isip ako kung, ma-fo fall ba ako sayo o hindi.
sabi ko, eto na to. alam kong malapit na akong ma-fall sa kanya. but then, sabi sakin ng isa ko pang friend, may crush ka daw ng isa pa. i was so sad. idk. baka na-fall na talaga ako sayo. hindi kita pinapansin the whole day. akala mo na-oawkwardan lang ako. but no. not even close.
na-disappoint lang siguro ako sayo. di na tayo nagpapansinan. this day, tomorrow, after tomorrow. hanggang "hi po" nalang tayo.
you changed. why? simula nung hindi mo na siya crush, you became a fuck boy. idk. you started having many crushes and idk. idk. idk. ewan ko ba. paki ko ba. idc.
you dont know what crush means. ang sakit lang. alam mo yung tipong pa-dive ka na but kinagat ka ng shark? namatay ka tuloy. hindi mo na natuloy mag-dive.
parang ako lang. malapit na akong ma-fall sayo but may nagsabi sakin na marami kang crush (which i think is true because many people say it) kaya di ko na naituloy ma fall sayo.
I stopped myself from falling. and super sakit non.
