Erwin X Eyebrows

Chapter Only

        Once upon a time, there was a commander of the Survey Corps. This man's name was Erwin Smith, and he had some big ass eyebrows!

        His eyebrows were so fabulous because every morning he would go and spend hundreds of dollars on getting them trimmed, and then getting glitter painted on them. He did this for his eyebrow, because he loved them.

        But there was a problem with his love... He couldn't choose which eyebrow he loved more. His right eyebrow, or his left? He loved them both equally. They had been with him trough thick an thin, hairy and bald! How could he choose just one?!

         After a long time of thinking, Erwin came to a decision. He had remembered an old saying and he was going to live up to them. He loved his eyebrows, and he let them go...

        One day, instead of painting glitter on his eyebrows, he painted anti-hair gel on his eyebrows. Because of this, they fell off of his face and died.

        Erwin was sad for the rest of the day because he looked like a retard without eyebrows. Even when new ones grew onto his face, he was still sad. They didn't feel the same they weren't...fabulous!

       To fix this he spent a whole day beautifying his new eyebrows, causeing him to once again fall in love. And thus, the cycle of eyebrow love repeated. Over and over, until he died. The. Fucking. End.