The Reason I Love You (JakeDirk)

Part Two: Porcelain Doll

"You stay here with me."

Jake was baffled by the sudden statement. Dirk had said it so casually, so easily, it must have been a slip of the tongue. "Excuse me?" Jake asked, the proposal still ricocheting between his ears.

"You heard me, English." Dirk sighed more than spoke, "I want to take care of you. And I want you to take care of yourself, but at the moment, I can't trust that you will on your own." Jake almost interrupted him to state that Jade was staying with him, but was too busy turning over the idea in his mind. "I need you to take care of me, too." Dirk offered, looking smaller than what Jake had remembered of him. "I can make another bed, I can do anything." he pleaded, "just stay here with me."

Dirk had known that Jake would steal his heart again. he knew that there was a reason that some smiling god had connected them today, of all days, the day that he needed Jake in such a way. Dirk had known this, that Jake was a thief and a darling and a lover all wrapped in one package, that there was no escape that could bring him closure. He had understood that there was no reason for him to cry because someday, he'd cry all over again.

So he punished himself.

He was so brutal and so vicious to himself, he had left a hole in his own being that nothing could begin to fill. He knew he would come crawling to Jake again, he would beg on his knees just for Jake's love and affection again.

The words rumbled in Jake's very being once again. Stay with me. He had no defenses. He had no energy to try anything but nod. he stepped forward, bringing himself to wrap his arms around Dirk's slim figure, so fragile now, so breakable. Like a porcelain doll with cracks lacing it's skin, like spiderwebs. He was so delicate, so precious.

But Jake nodded, nonetheless. And Dirk, for the first time in at least Three Nexian years, cried into the shoulder of his ex-boyfriend.