UNSCATHED

Chapter 11

          DYING?

Pique had told her there were lots of ways to die, either with help from someone else if you needed it or by your own hand; he had been very enthusiastic about it. His words had slurred more and his eyes had lit up. He had told her if he had been her and unable to do most things herself, he would have tried at least one way by now. His smile had been so bright then she could hardly look at him.

   "I don't want to die," said Tasha, "I really don't....."

As a teen she'd entertained the idea about once a week but knowing this would be difficult had quashed it.

"Then why look up suicide websites?" asked the Staff Member.

"We were looking up horror films," said Tasha, "and we.....we found them accidentally."

"Your parents ...." said the Staff Member, "they mentioned old friends of yours; two boys, when you were in your teens, about sixteen -- and in mainstream schooling. They said neither were disabled. Can you remember –- did something happen to either of them?" She whispered to a colleague, "I'm not really qualified for this...."

"I don't know –- I haven't seen them for decades," Tasha sniffed, " and I probably never will again......"

"They loved horror, didn't they? They were always talking about directing horror films, or becoming serial killers, weren't they? They loved heavy metal too, didn't they?"

Tasha nodded; her stomach was starting to hurt again.

"From what your parents have said," said the Staff member, "it sounds as if a lot of your old friends' tales were not altogether true."

"Of course they weren't....." said Tasha.

"Despite the fact you never saw or spoke to either of these friends of yours outside of school, even though seventeen years passed – seventeen, Tasha!" The tone seemed to imply that Tasha should have forgotten them both by now. "Nobody seemed to measure up to them, did they? Then you met our new resident...."

      "Don't say his name," Tasha spat, "you're not fit to say his name!"

     "He was hardly fit to say yours," said her colleague. She had also never liked him and made no secret of her feelings; just because he had been able to do most things for himself –- and would have done so had he had a place at the Warehouse –- it didn't mean their jobs would have been any less difficult than they were when they were looking after her.

" This friend of yours," she continued, "didn't even say goodbye when he stormed out; that's how much he cared."

     "Stop it! Stop it!"

     "You just wait, Tasha", said the younger Staff Member, "it will sink in and soon it will come as a great relief."

The Staff Member ignored the comment.

If not him, Tasha thought, it would be someone else......the cycle will start again.....

"He –- the new resident – talked about and seemed to show enthusiasm for the same things -- and not a great deal else –- didn't he?"

Tasha nodded.

"You two seemed to get on –- though I and more than a few of my colleagues feel that you were a lot happier before he arrived, as do your parents. "

Several Staff nodded; a few shook their heads. One who had shaken his head, started to play some music; he jumped up and down as though at a festival.