Unsteady

Chapter 1

I exhale deeply as I look at the time on the corner of my laptop. Two hours passed midnight and my mug was currently empty. Slowly getting out of my bed I make my way towards the kitchen. After filling my mug with coffee, for the second time tonight I walk back to my room and shut the door behind me. Feeling jittery after taking a sip of my coffee. coffee. My screen lights up and there appears his name, Cole. Suddenly the coffee wasn't the only thing keeping me up. But of course I should of realized that all he wanted was to know was if I was done writing his paper. I look up and see my reflection in my mirror. How could he want someone like me? I thought to myself. Taking another gulp of my coffee and going back to writing the paper.

Waking up to a now drool filled laptop I realized there was slim to no chance that I was finishing that paper, my alarm would go off soon, seeing that it is now 6:57 am. I decide to take my laptop to school and try to finish it during study hall. Getting up I walk towards my bathroom. Yet again I find myself looking into the same eyes I once knew yet somehow now feel so distant from. I slowly undress myself and climb into the shower. After about thirty minutes of standing under the warm water I get out and wrap a rather large towel around my waist. I go over to my closet and see my clothes, unfolded and wrinkly. Finding whatever is closest to me and check myself out in the mirror. Simple dark and jeans and a huge sweater that cascades down my tiny torso. Converse it is. Slowly making my way down the stairs I see my father in the corner of my eye. He spots me and calls me over. "Looking for these?" The smell of booze instantly hits and I step back a little and nod. He throws them directly at my face, causing yet another little scratch on my cheekbone.

I walk out and take a deep breath. By now, I'll be lucky if I don't get a detention. I quickly speed down the busy streets and go directly to my parking spot. I look through my glove compartment and find a little bandaid. It's better then not covering it, I thought to myself. Looking at myself one last time in the rearview mirror I feel nothing but disgust for the man I call my father. Quickly, I make my way to the corresponding building and sit down at a computer. My head was killing me, I needed sleep. "Hey lover boy", I hear Cole whisper into my ear. Chills run up my back and I sit up as straight as possible. I turn over and look into those beautiful blue-green eyes. "How's my essay coming along?" He seems a little weird right now. I smile and lean on him. He smells like one of those high class expensive colognes, I inhale the scent deeply and look up at him. My chin was resting on his chest and he just looked down at me. He wasn't moving? I feel his arms wrap around me. I scoot closer and smile to myself. I hated him, I hated how he always used me. But yet, here I am. Allowing him to use me as much as he wants, I blink a couple tears that were brimming on my eyes. The door creeks open and he instantly pushed me off him. I roll my eyes as he scurries off into another section of the hall. An hour quickly passes and I luckily finish in time. After emailing the file to Cole I walk out and walk towards my next class. In the corner I see Cole and his new girl, she was perfect. She catches me observing them and smiles before pulling him into a huge kiss. A wave of jealousy washes over me and I walk faster.

The rest of my day consisted of me just dozing off and falling asleep during every lesson. I pull my keys out of my school bag and unlock my car.I jumped when I hear Jaspers voice coming from the backseat. I open my car door, get out and then slam it shut. He does the same. "What the hell is wrong with you?" I yell. He grabs me forcefully and presses me against the car next to mine. "Get away from me!" His lips begin to attack my own and all the sounds that I was making were nearly a muffled noise. "I've missed you baby." His voice is repulsive. I tried squirming out of the hold he had me in, but he wouldn't budge. "Sorry, I don't speak pig." A stinging sensation burns my skin as I realized that he slapped me. That was when I lost it, I kneed him in the stomach and pushed him to the ground. As soon as I jump on him I feel arms wrap around my waist lifting me up. I'm shoved into the passenger seat of a four-door truck and I shortly recognized who I was with. The familiar dinging sound starts once I see the drivers door open. Soon he pulls out of his parking space and drives off school campus. I hadn't even realized that I was crying until I felt warm hands rub my cheeks. I snuggle into his large hand and look up at him. He pulls over and looks over to me. "What was that?" He asked. "You wouldn't understand." I respond, looking away. He is just so beautiful, he makes me smile and right now, I don't want to smile.