Totally Crushed

Chapter 2 _ True Confessions

Jieun was waiting for us in front of the school as promised, impatiently chomping on blueberry bubble gum.

"Sorry, Suzy. I cant let you into the building." She blocked me with her arm. "Spirit Week dress code violation. The blue coat has to go. No colors other than red and white allowed within fifty feet of Krinin High School property." She squinted at Jinyoung's coat. "What color is that? Rust?"

Jinyoung looked down at his jacket. "Um. I guess you can called it rust. But it's in the red family."

"I'll let it slide this time." Jieun said, "But you're on notice, bud."

I laughed. She was wearing blue jeans, black sneakers, and a green coat - not a speck of red that I could see. She's tall and has untamable brown curls that she'd bunched into a fat ponytail with an white elastic, but that elastic seemed awfully tiny to qualify for Red and White Day. "Where's your valentine outfit?" I asked.

"Ta da." She unzipped her coat. Underneath she wore a red superhero T-shirt with a big white V on it. "Victor to the rescue." Jieun's younger brother, Victor, thinks he's a superhero called Kid Victorious. He's ten. Jieun's parents tolerate this by letting him dress like a superhero most days. Jieun thinks he should have grown out of it by now. We're afraid Victor is doomed to be a dweeb for life.

Jiyoung grinned. "Now that's the Valentine's day spirit."

"No, it isn't." I said. "The spirit just happens to be red. And it just happens to have the letter V on it. It has nothing to do with Valentine's Day. I'll let you slide this time." I tease Jieun. "But you're on notice, girl."

She laughed.

The first bell rang, so we all went inside. "See you at lunchtime." Jinyoung called, heading left to his locker. Jieun and I went to the other way. Our lockers are next to each other since my last name (Yoon) comes right after hers (Y-lee) on the alphabetical class list. That's how we met last year, on the first day of tenth grade. I showed up on the first day of school and there she was, taping a poster of Spider-Man to the inside of her locker door. (She doesn't like to admit it, but the superhero fixation runs in the family.) She's over her Spider-Man phase now - she says. Sometimes I wonder.

We strolled down the twelve grade hall. "Wow." I said. "Doesn't everything look great?"

The Spirit Week committee had decorated the school with hearts and balloons and red and white streamers. A big poster reminded everyone of the Carnation Code: white for teachers, pink for friends, and red for crushes.

"Better than the usual toxic industrial green, that's for sure." Jieun said.

Two popular twelve graders, Lee Min-young and Nam Woohyun, leaned against a locker, holding hands. In one arm Min-young held a big heart shaped candy box.

"It's their one-year anniversary." Jieun said. "They started dating on Valentine's Day last year."

"I didn't know that,' I said. "Seems like they've been together forever."

"Woohyun gave Min-young a red carnation," Jieun smiled. "Then he asked her to go to the skating party with him. And that's was that. They've been together ever since."

"That's so romantic." I smiled.

"I know." Jieun said. "Suzy, you're the heart expert. How do you think you know when you really like someone?"

I glanced at her, a little surprised. Usually I was the one with the gossip about who like who and how they got together. Though I'd hardly call myself an expert. Jieun suddenly seemed uncharacteristically interested in Valentine's Day. And she wouldn't meet my eye. Now I'm suspicious.

"Well," I started. "I think I've got it figured out. When you really like someone, there are signs. The first one is butterflies in your stomach, worse than on a test day. Then you get goose bumps on your forearms. Finally, you get a spacy, head-spinning feeling, I call it Crush Dizziness."

"Have you ever felt the signs?" Jieun asked.

"Two out of three." I said. "But since I had a stomach flu at the time, the butterflies might not have been from a crush."

"But how do you know?" Jieun asked. "You've never had a boyfriend."

"That's true, " I smile. "But I've seen a lot of movies, listened to a lot of songs, and read a lot of books."

"Still." She said.

As usual, Jieun was right. I've like plenty of boys, but so far none of them had returned the favor. I even had a few so-called "boyfriends" in elementary school - boys who sat with me at lunch or invited me to their birthday parties, only to stop as soon as some other boy started teasing them about being a "cootie-coated girl toucher," or some other inventive nickname. Then the boys would all run off to poke at a dead frog they found. Like rotting amphibian corpses aren't loaded with cooties. My point being: A boy who dumps you for a dead frog doesn't count as a real boyfriend.

Across the hall, Min-young opened her giant box of candy and fed Woohyun a chocolate. I sighed. To think it all started with a red carnation.

"Wouldn't it be great if something like that happened to us this year?" I said. "If we got red carnations, and someone asked us to the skating party?"

"Really great," Jieun said. "If you could get a red carnation form anyone at school, who would it be?"

"Hmm." We started walking again, and turned on the hall where our lockers were. I glanced at all the kids around me, especially the boys in their red-and-white outfits. I'd already ran through the possibilities in my mind, over and over.

"Well, there's Chanyeol," I said. Park Chanyeol and another boy kicked a balloon back and forth. His red T-shirt that says "EAGLES RULES." His eyes looked even bluer than usual, and that's pretty darn blue. "He's cute. And he broke up with CL over Christmas break."

Jieun nodded, "That's good."

And I always liked Byun Baekhyun," I said. Baekhyun was leaning against his locker, looking dashing in a red blazer and a long white scarf. "He's kind of sophisticated. We have Spanish together and he rolls his r's like a tiger - rrrrr."

"Baekhyun's nice." Jieun said. "But you do know he's not European."

"I know." Baekhyun is from Bucheon, South Korea. "But still - look at that scarf. He pulls it off like a Frenchman. Or at least French Canadian."

"For sure."

Down the hall a blonde boy slammed his locker shut, then beat a sophisticated drum rhythm on the outside of it.

"What about Minhyuk?" Jieun said. Kang Minhyuk was our class drummer boy.

"He's a little noisy foe me." I said. "But if he give me a red carnation, I won't say no."

Chanyeol, Baekhyun, and Minhyuk were all perfectly like able guys, but I didn't have crushes on them. Secretly, I was hoping for a surprise. Hoping that someone I'd never noticed, never thought about before, would appear to of nowhere and sweep me off my feet. Or off my skates, if I was lucky enough to go to the skating party with a boy.

"What about you?" I said. "If you could get a red carnation from anyone - who would you choose?"

Jieun blushed. She made herself busy digging books out of her locker. But I could see her ears, and they were redder than her Kid Victorious T-shirt.

"You like someone." I tease.

"No I don't." She denies.

"Yes you do." I said. "Jieun, it's so obvious."

She pulled her head out of her locker and finally looked at me. Her face was magenta.

This was big. The weird thing was, I couldn't imagine who in the world she could possibly like. I had absolutely no idea. And we were supposed to be best friends.

"Who?" I asked. "Who is it? IU, I'm your best friend. If you can't tell me, who can you tell?"

"In a way, you're the worst person in the world to tell." She said.

"Why?" I pouted.

"Because - you know him."

"Know who? Who are you talking about?"

"All right, I'll tell you. But you have to promise not to laugh." Jieun warned.

"I promise," I smiled. "Tell me before my head explodes."

"Okay," she said. "I like . . . . . . . Jinyoung."

"Jinyoung?!?!" At first the name did not compute. Jinyoung? Jinyoung who?! "You mean, Jung Jinyoung? My next door neighbor Jinyoung."

She nodded. She looked so embarrassed I could tell this was a heavy crush. Like, really serious. Still, I found it hard to believe.

"You like Jung Jinyoung?" I said one more time, for confirmation.

"Yes." Jieun said.

"You," I repeated, pointing at her so it would be perfectly clear which you I was talking about, "Like Jinyoung ---"

"Stop it, Suzy. Yes, me, I like Jinyoung."

"For how long?" I asked. "How long could you keep a secret like this from me?"

"I don't really know," she said. "I just looked at him one day last week and it hit me. I like him."

"That's so great!" I squealed. I was beginning to realize what this meant. My best friend liked my other best friend. Fantastic! My two favorite people in the world - as a couple! What could be better? Or more efficient? Jieun could have a boyfriend, and Jinyoung could have a girlfriend, and my life wouldn't have to change it at all.

"Do you think he likes me, too?" Jieun asked.

Hmm. I had no idea. But I remembered how evasive he'd been when I asked him if he'd bought anyone a red carnation. He definitely liked someone. Why shouldn't that someone be Jieun?

But I didn't know for sure and I didn't wan to get Jieun hopes up. I had to be careful.

"He never tells me stuff like that," I said. "But I have a feeling he likes somebody. I'll see what I can find out."

"Thanks, Suzy!" The bell rang. We slammed our lockers shut and headed for class. "You're the best best friend ever, Suzy."

Yes, I thought, feeling pretty proud of myself. I was ready to help my two best friends find happiness. Even though there was no boy on my own horizon - yet - at least my friends would live happily ever after, thanks to me. I felt  like a fairy godmother. I am the best best friend ever, aren't I?

Carnation delivery time was only a few hours away. The thought made me shiver with excitement. Would I get a red carnation? Would Jieun? By lunch time we'd know!