He wasn't going to lie. His heart was beating in his chest, and into his ears, and his veins igniting his whole body. He's never done this before, and he was so, so scared.
Youngjae had called Jungkook and Jimin, the two most hopeful of the group because he knew they'd help make what he was about to do, feel like a fairytale.
They had been working since the sun was barely peeking up and the cold air was pricked with promise, and as if now the sun was starting to disappear behind the small hills where they lived. His arms and body were tired but they hummed with a kind of nervous excitement that made him restless and he just couldn't shake it.
"Hey, youngjae" Jungkook called hanging a string of lights. "We're about done, I think it's about time to call him."
"I- I don't think I can go through with this."
"Oh come on. It's obvious Jaebum-hyung likes you too." Jimin chimed in.
"Plus after working all day if you don't do this, I'll kill both of you."
Alright. I'll call him.
Ring ring.
"Hey, Jae?"
" Oh! Youngjae. Hi!" Jaebum said answering the phone excitedly, but immediately quieting down and backing off, seeming timid.
Jaebum sounded so nervous and shy, but there was no denying he was ecstatic to be talking to Youngjae, to everyone but Youngjae I guess.
"Could you uh- meet me in the school garden?"
"Sure I'll see you soon!"
Jimin and Jungkook who had seemed to become particularly close, gave youngjae a thumbs up, before giggling and leaving the garden, forcing youngjae to sit and wait, his heart beating out if his chest.
Maybe twenty minutes had passed before a quiet rustling of the now long-dead leaves could be heard throughout the thick winter air.
When Jaebum finally came into view, the one thing Youngjae noticed immediately was how wide his eyes were. He tuned a corner and his eyes were illuminated by the bright yellow light he was staring at, with a desperately confused looked plastered onto his countenance.
"Youngjae? What- What is all of this?"
His dismay almost looked almost angry, but Youngjae was sure that's not it was.
"It's just a little something I set up... I wanted to talk to you."
Youngjae motioned towards the garden before patting the seat next to him. But Jaebum wasn't ready to sit down. He stood- awestruck.
The bland school garden that on any given day consisted of patchy green and brown grass, flower beds, spare trees, and the old rusting furniture, had compeltly transformed. It was a beacon tearing the dark cold. The flower beds were illuminated, and new, yellow daffodils had been planted. The rust had been scraped off of the arch in the middle of the field. It now shone silver, and wildflowers made of strung gold was weaved through the twisted metal frame. Lights hung from the willow trees, and softly lit the field which on any other occasion was completely overlooked. It even happened that yellow petals littered the ground. But all of this, wasn't even the best part.
The best part was the thing sitting under the arch. The arch itself was placed around a small wooden bench, and on that beach was Youngjae.
The backlight made his skin gleam. And, he wore the same golden makeup he wore that first day they'd ever talked. Except, and jaebum wasn't exactly sure how but, it looked even better today than it did on that day. It was as if heavenly light shone on him, but maybe it was just the fairy lights from the trees.
Jaebum realised after a moment he was being rude, and sat on the bench next to Youngjae. Unknown to him, his eyes were still wide and he was study every detail of the scenery in hopes he wouldn't creepily stare at Youngjae, but it's all he wanted to do. He was stunning.
"I never thought until I met you Jae that the colour yellow would have such significance. But see the thing is- now whenever I see it all I can do is think about you "
Jaebum wasn't quite sure where Youngjae was going with to be honest. He obviously had his hopes, but he'd liked Youngjae for so long.
"I know for a fact that the day you met me, I was crying my yellow eyeshadow off, and the first time I came to your apartment, you lit it up with this dim glow, and it wasn't even the lights." Youngjae blushed as he realised what he said. He was being so, bold. "It was you Jae. You were this light. You glowed and shined and every word that means something like that. I wanted to light up this garden in order to tell you this but it doesn't even compare to you, who is so bright."
Youngjae put his right hand on the bench between he and Jaebum, and shifted his weight in its direction. The Left, came a little slower, a little more precisely, and with a little fear. But it did come eventually. It rose slowly to rest on Jaebums warm skin which was heated from the cold outside, but the tip of his nose was still red and cold.
Youngjae used the nervous pulsing of his heart as timing. He'd give himself three beats to work up his courage.
One. He looked Jaebum dead in the eyes, knowing what he was about to do.
Two. He ran his thumb across Jaebums cheek and smile a little at the stunned look he had on his face.
Three. He kissed him.
