I used to not believe in much. But, at the late age of sixteen years old, I realised it was better to believe in something bigger than yourself, and in return it makes you a bigger, better person. I was a Christian, and I thought of God as myself, but just a stronger person when I was weak, and a person that would tell me everything was fine when it wasn't. It was a better me, and it wasn't just a fantasy, it wasn't just me talking to myself; it was what I wanted to be, what I strived for. And everyday, I realised how much stronger it made me and how much more capable I was of overcoming things. It's human nature to want to put the blame on another person, but I found that believing that there was someone up there made me want to put the blame on them, but made me realise how stupid I was for it, and that it was all me. Believing changed me, for the better.
I wasn't socially awkward, but fitting in seemed a huge task, and I realised I had been searching for recognition before I even knew what the word meant. Everyone wants to be noticed, but only some become that bright shining star that everyone looked up to, and everyone worshipped, almost like a God. However, that was not me.
I once bought a notebook which had the words 'Live to inspire' on the front cover and that was exactly what I needed, what I pined for in life, I wanted to not only be recognised, but to inspire. When you think you're invisible, it immediately gives you the mindset that you won't achieve and won't inspire, but I was so wrong to judge myself before I even knew 'me'.When love came into my life he filled the role I had been searching to fill. He wasn't perfect, he had baggage, but he understood my baggage and listened; he cared. He inspired me, so I could inspire him. We both lived in a bubble that we thought no one could penetrate.
Even stained by his past, he was certain that his present would have me in it and it would be better, I would make it better. He didn't believe in the word future, but thought that it was too certain, when things are too likely to change.
He loved me for the way I accepted him, past, present and eternity. I loved who he was, and who he would always be.
He loved me not for the way I danced with his angels but for the sound of my voice could silence his demons.
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Finding Troy
Romance"I don't know where we stand." Rose's eyes locked into his. "This isn't normal, this isn't what it's supposed to be like, and I feel like I'm weighing you down. All the time." Tears pricked his eyes, as he took a seat on the bench, gazing out at the...