Alone

The Fire

My mother used to tell me about the ocean.She said there was a place where there was nothing but water as far as you could see;that it was always moving,rushing towards you and then away.She once showed me a picture that she said was my great-great-great-grandmother,standing in the ocean as a child.It has been years since,and the picture was lost to the fire long ago,but i remember it,faded and worn.A little girl among nothingness.
The Forest of Hands and Teeth

Before the fire i would always go to my mothers room,open the last draw and fish out the box containing the picture .......and just speak.I would tell that little girl in the picture everything and anything,and as i would speak little pools of tears would come up and start to pour from my eyes and i would never know why.It just felt like she was there and she was my 'angel'.It sounds silly now that i look back and glaze upon the life that is completely different to today but it would and will never be silly to me.At times i would lay in bed with that picture and imagine what she would say to me and how she would look at me now.I knew she didn't know me but it felt like she did,like she was there with me.
"baby,stop,you're doing it again aren't you......shhh don't cry babe"I snapped out and saw my mother walking down from what was left of the steps and wrapped me in her arms.I raised my fingertips against my face and felt the soft,wet,dampness of tears.
"everything is okay now,was it hard to come back?"she questioned ,my head held gently in her warm hands.
"baby speak to me"she probed,lifting my chin high so our eyes met,and i began to see the delicate wrinkles around her eyes.The frown line on her forehead from no doubt thinking about our situation...alot.
"I love you so much"i blurted wrapping my arms against her neck planting kisses on her cheeks."Yes it was hard, i felt constricted,stuck....I-I-I-I thought i wasn't gonna be able to leave."i wailed, more tears spurting from my eyes.My mum then wiped the tears of my cheeks with her thumb and then went back to her previous stance of holding my head in her palms.
"i love you too baby"She whispered.After a few minutes of standing and watching the sun get lower my belly began to growl in hunger.The growl of my stomach intercepting the comfortable silence seemed funny to us somehow resulting in us bursting out laughing for a while.
"I guess we could all use some food"she managed to squeeze out inbetween laughter.

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