giving my heart to her

the origins of a broken heart freshman

     now..... it begins...
   Dante is a gentleman who respects woman. because of that he didnt find much love in middle school.
   he wasn't expecting any much luck in high school, u know having the same people who thought you were weird for being alone going to the same exact high school as u. talk about a living fuck hell if u tell me.
 
   first day of high school. I wake up to my phone ringing.  "hello". "time to get up" said Dantes mom. hanging up the phone I just lay there for about 15 minutes thinking. "here we go again another year of fucking school".
   I get up and go take a shower. i begin to just laying there with the hot water hitting me thinking why another year of school. can I just quit now. getting out of the shower i think, what will i wear? pulling clothing after clothing  i end up putting on a pair of black Dickies and a green nike shirt. i wasted so much time picking my clothes i didnt have time to eat, even though I planned on not eating anyways.
  i then begin Walking down my neighborhood to the bus stop, as im Walking i see other kids coming out there houses Walking in the same direction. my anxiety hit me because of the fear i wasnt walking fast enough so i just moved out of the way and let the other kids pass me. finally after 5 blocks i get to the bus stop, seeing many different faces. i didnt no anyone there so i just went to the part of the sidewalk with no one near. i just put my headphones in listening to my favorite Duo TWIZTID, and ignored everyone else who was talking to each other, making friends.
   when the bus finally came i just went to first empty seat i saw. through the whole ride to school i was nervous like crazy. thinking stupid thoughts like if there was a freshman initiations waiting to paddle us like the movie dazed and confused. lol. but once i got there i was so relieved. phew! no freshman hunt! as i started walking people were yelling freshman this way! leading us to the freshman building.
   going into the building i seen what looked like millions of kids sitting at tables eating breakfast, talking.  i just went to restroom and splashed water on my face,  cause in my mind i was freaking out bad. there was so many students and it was only freshman. it made me wonder how much more it is with the sophomores, juniors, and seniors.
   after a while the bell rang and that herd of kids all got up and began going up the stairs. of course my class was on the 3rd floor. it took me 10 minutes to get to my 1st class.
  1st period: algebra......
  i walk into the class and there's a bunch of kids just sitting down talking to their friends. i see no one i know so i just head to an empty seat and listen to more music. the teacher comes in talking about math and what we will learn. i don't pay attention much because I hate math and am not good at it.
i end up suffering in my classes until 3rd period: band. i was so excited to start playing in the schools marching band. i walked into the band room and i see a row of snare drums. i then run up and start playing it a lil. the feeling of playing the snare made me so happy. the teacher than came in. Mr Duran, who after this year abandons us and quits and becomes a middle school teacher for music. he lets us just play through the whole class. then it was on to my art class which was really close.
  I walk into the classroom and sit at the closest table. then this one girl then sits right next to me. 5 foot, blonde hair, glasses, wearing clothing very girly. she then tries to talk to me.  saying hi my name is Nichole. I then start talking to her. she's telling me about the different foundations she has in her hello kitty handbag. 5 other girls and my friend Bryan who went to middle school with me, then came and sat down at my table. the teacher who taught the art class was a down to earth flower power lady named clover. she asked us to draw our names and design it. as we started designing all these girls were talking and be social with everyone even me. I started to get comfortable talking to them even though I could never talk to anyone. I then started being funny making fun of my friend Bryan because his name art looked like it said Brayon. all the girls started laughing at my joke and then I realized how cute these girls were. it gave me an idea that I might even hook up with them. but just to let u know it didn't happen i didnt see those girls ever again due to them moving my classes around making me have art for 6th... except Nicole. but my life now, 5 years later I am happy in love with the girl i gave my heart to,❤ Johana Krueger❤.
   I then went to my 5th period very happy cause I enjoyed art talking to those beautiful girls. I decided to sit in the back when all of a sudden i hear "omg we have another class together". I then turn my head and I see Nichole coming into the classroom. she sits at the only big table in the classroom. she then tells me, come sit by me? we then talk about how we are gonna be best friends and always hang out. in my mind im thinking "yay i have someone to talk to at lunch". I won't be a loner this year😏.
  lunch then came and I hung out with Nichole through the whole lunch. she was asking things about me. what I like, what do I like to do? of course I asked her the same questions.
  lunch ended sadly..... so I went to my last two classes one being Spanish with one of the meanest teachers. Mrs  Delores Mora. I was walking to the bus when I heard Nichole yell my name. she asked me "are you gonna go to the freshmen dance tonight"? that I only needed a dollar to get in. I told her no. she then begged me to go handing me 4 quarters and pulling me in the line.
  while in the line i then started talking to this one guy whose older sister was telling him shit. his name was Dom. we got in the dance Dom just hung out with me.... when all of a sudden a girl comes up to me and asks me if I wanted to dance with her. I panicked and acted like she was talking to Dom so I told him to dance with her. he did, but in my mind i thought I fucked up. that she might of liked me and maybe wanted to hook up, she was cute. after the dance i called my mom asking her to pick me up, when all of a sudden i saw her. this girl was so beautiful. 5.4, brown hair, brown eyes wearing a brown sweater with her hair in a ponytail. she was walking to the front as well to be picked up. I wanted to talked to her but I got choked up and chickened out.
  my dad was the one who came and got me. "did you get laid"? said my dad. I told him no and I started laughing.  I then got home and layed down to fall asleep, but I couldn't stop thinking about her. Me not even knowing her name........