Protective Secrets (The Protective Series, Book 3)

Chapter Twenty-Two

I awoke with a start, my heart pounding inside my chest. My blurry eyes took in the familiarity of my bedroom, scanning the floor and walls for anything out of place. Then I noticed the reason for my sudden panic. Standing in the corner of my room, dressed in the same uniform he died in, was Janne.

He looked real. His shoulder-length chocolate brown waves sat motionless over his black leather jacket, his dark eyes piercing straight through me like thin sharp bladed knives. Nothing about him screamed friendly or loving, like it used to. He looked mad at someone - or something.

"J-Janne," I gulped, unable to control my shocked stutter upon seeing him in my house. "How did you - you're supposed to be dead!"

"You let him kill me," he whispered so silently I almost missed it. "You stood there and watched him kill me, while you did nothing!"

Frightened, I ripped the sheets from my body and fell to my knees in front of him, placing my hands together in front of my bowed head as if ready to pray. "Janne, I'm so sorry. I tried to help you! Really, I did, but I was too late. You were already gone."

"Liar!" He bellowed, his hand flying out to slap me across the face. "You could have stopped him! It's because of you I'm dead! It's all your fault!"

The throbbing sting of his assault mixed with my salty tears. All I could do was sit there on my knees and sob over someone I loved, someone I'd watch die with my own eyes. I should have done more - I should have thrown Mikko off the roof that night and watched him splatter to the ground.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry," I continued to cry, unable to stop. I'd held myself together so well up until then, but hearing him spit those vile words broke me all over again. "I love you! Please don't hate me."

He scoffed, coldly dismissing my confession as if it meant nothing to him. "It's too late for that, Jed."

"NO!" I screamed as loud as I could, hiccuping the harder I sobbed. I felt pathetic, crying in front of the man I loved. The man who was treating me like his enemy.

"I never loved you! I just used you for sex, and you let me," a dark smirk flickered up the side of his mouth, causing goosebumps to explode all over my skin. "You were always so weak, always so gullible, to see that you meant nothing to me."

I crept forward on my hands and knees until I was in front of him, grovelling at his feet. My hands gripped the legs of his leather pants firmly, my strangled sobs going unheard over his malicious laughter.

"Please forgive me," I attempted to reason with him, wiping my wet cheeks with one hand. "Please, Janne. We can fix things."

A sharp pain ripped through my back suddenly. I cried out as blood filled my mouth, reaching behind me to where the blade had sunken into my skin. Closing my fingers around the cold handle, I tried to jerk it out, only to crumble when Janne forced it in deeper. I felt the blade pierce my heart, knowing it was all over.

"Jed!" A frantic voice pulled me from my nightmare.

I gasped for air, sitting up straight in an unfamiliar bed. It took me a full minute to realise I was in the Marriott, and this was Mark's designated room. Jarmo stood over the bed, his hands resting on my shoulders. The planes of his hard-featured, serious face sketched an anxious expression crossed with consternation.

"Sorry," I bit my lip, avoiding his eyes. "I suffer nightmares sometimes. I wasn't expecting it to happen while I was here."

The edge of the mattress dipped underneath his weight as he joined me, brushing his messy hair from his face. "You don't need to apologise. I woke up to you screaming and rushed over to see what was wrong." His chest deflated with a gloomy sigh. "It was about Janne, wasn't it?"