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11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarassed when they open by themselves.

12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"

13. Greet everyone on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

14. One word: Flatulence!

15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

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