Survivors: W4R

Elder's Landing, Two Months After the Attack...

                Oh my God, this place actually has BEDS! Sam, a kid only about thirteen signs. He was in an accident before all this, and lost his voice… for good. For six years, as Jess tells me, he has been mute. He is a short, skinny kid, with greasy black hair and wide, curious, ice blue eyes. He is the smartest thirteen-year-old I have ever met. I can’t sign, so Alice helps me. She is a few inches shorter than me, with silky blonde hair and freckles dotting her round, small face. Her eyes are a sparkling green, so kind and warm. She has a child’s smile and laugh, but is amazingly adult. I feel heat rushing to my cheeks when I think about her, then shake the thought away. You just lost Shadow! How can you be thinking about another girl so soon?! I feel a sharp pain bite my hand as my nails dig into my palm. Blood drips from my hand. “Rian, a little help here?” Eren calls across from the room. He is talking to the mayor of the small settlement. We walked north from Phoenix until the heat forced us to find shelter. A group of scouts from the settlement, named Elder’s Landing found us. They brought us here, and are agreeing to let us stay here until we are all healed up. I walk up to the two and ask, “What’s the problem?” I wait for an answer. “Y’all are causing too much panic. The people here don’t like newcomers that much, and they won’t have you guys in our civilian’s barracks. Get your group and follow me. We have a house that’ll get you all private living spaces,” he says. “Private spaces? That sounds great! But why were you arguing with him about it, Eren?” I am confused. Why would he not want to have his own room?

                We walk down the empty street of the far side of the town to a small building on a hill. At first it just looks like a warehouse, but then I notice a cross leaning against it, and the words on the front that say “First Baptist Church of R.” The last word had fallen on the ground, its letters scattered on the overgrown grass. “We’re staying in a church?” Jess says, confused. I nod and open the door, what I see is unexpected. There are no pews, instead there are walls made of whatever wood they could find, and spaces in those walls covered by sheets, our “Doors.” I stare at the improvised rooms, and can’t help but feel a smile spread across my face, despite everything going on. “Sir, how can we repay you?” I ask, for once in a long time actually meaning it. This guy let us into his town, ignoring the citizens’ concerns. “You don’t have to repay us with anything, just don’t kill any of our own,” He smiles warmly, a glint in his eyes. I exchange glances with Luke, and we both silently agree on one thing. “We can’t stay here, at least not too long.”

                I see Shadow. We are running in a pasture, laughing and happy, like this world never even existed. I see something in her face I’ve only seen once before: pure joy. I laugh and look down at my feet, then back up. She is gone, replaced by dragonflies. I look around. “Shadow?” My voice is far off, like it’s someone else calling her name. I turn around, and Shadow lunges at me, her face pale and bloody with a hungry look on it. Her teeth sink into my thigh, and everything goes black. I jolt awake, a quiet yelp escaping my lips. I look down at my leg, and it is fine. The bed is soaked in cold sweat, and I am as well. My body shivers violently, and my sight loses focus as tears fill my eyes. I draw my knees to my chest, bury my face in them, and sob. I am alone. No one can hear me cry because they’re asleep, right? I feel like I’ve been crying for hours now, like the sun will be up any minute now. I hear my curtain draw back, and hear light footsteps. I look up and see Alice, her hair a mess and her face sleepy. She still looks amazing. “Rian? You okay?” she asks, looking worried.

                I look back down, trying to hide my tears. It’s too late, she’s already seen them, and heard me. But I don’t care. I just want to hide. I feel the mattress shrink as she sits beside me, and feel her arms wrap around me. It gets warm as the space between us closes, and she rests her head on my shoulder. I still don’t look up. We sit in silence, listening to the only sound of snoring and whimpering coming from the other rooms for a while, until Alice breaks the silence. “What was your dream about?” she asks, her voice soft, like a mother talking to her son. I feel small, but I like it. “S-Shadow,” I stutter quietly, then wince at the memory. “Oh. I’m sorry,” she says, her voice suddenly growing small. I feel her head move as she sits up. I do the same and look over at her, wiping tears from my eyes. I notice some in hers, as well, then blink. She wipes her tears and smiles sadly at me. “She must’ve meant a lot to you, huh?” I feel my heart sink at her words, as if it were an anvil. That’s an understatement, I think, though I just nod slowly. “She’s dead,” it hurts to finally say it out loud, but I need to grab hold of a fact. It gives me a sense of control, I guess. “I know, Rian, I know,” she whispers into my ear, her hand finding mine. I pull away, but she takes it again, moving her thumb in small circles to calm me down. I feel my breathing slow down and my heart rate calm as I let her pull me into her arms. We rock back in forth until I fall asleep, this time with no dreams. “She’s dead…”