For What Reason Are You Questioning My Capability To Cry?

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

February 8, 2017

  Dark. Pitch black. Quiet. Peaceful. Just how she likes it. But of course, she doesn't ever get anything how she likes it. Erynn gets what she can and is grateful. So when her brother pulled her from her peaceful sleep, she wasn't exactly ecstatic.

  "Erynn!" He yelled throughout their tiny apartment. She groaned and turned over, trying to get a couple more minutes of sleep. But of course, that didn't last long. He just had to take her blanket. Erynn's only source of heat keeping her from the freezing cold room.

  He laughed, running out of her room along with her blanket. Poor, soft, warm blanket. She wonders if it misses her. She sure misses it. But alas, she must exit her warm bed and venture into the cold abyss known as the hallway.

  "Come on Jonah," she groaned. "Give it back. I'm cold." He only laughed and threw it at her, resulting with it landing on her head. She lightly punched his arm and walked back to her room.

  "Love you too, boo!" He yelled with pure sarcasm. Erynn giggled and walked into the bathroom to take a shower. She rushed out when she found that school started in only fifteen minutes. Quickly getting dressed, she rushed out the door with Jonah and headed towards school.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  She walked through school with a blank face. Show no emotion, don't get hurt. That was her logic. She didn't say it was good logic. But it works for her.

  She didn't necessarily have friends. Sure, she talks to a few people here and there. But she doesn't have true, real friends. Yeah, she knows. It sounds like she's a hopeless romantic, waiting for someone to see her out of the crowd of beautiful girls and sweep Erynn off her feet. Well, no. You see, she couldn't care less about love or relationships.

They don't happen. Ever. True love doesn't exist and happy endings are for children. She is not a child. She hasn't been since that night. She doesn't think she ever will be.

  As she passed people running towards their classes, Erynn swore she could feel a pair of eyes on her back. And they seem to be extremely judgemental. It made her feel very uneasy and slightly self conscious. Slightly. She decided to ignore it, seeing as though the pair of judgmental eyes would not make themselves known. Erynn decides it's not worth the time of day, so she continues on to her second period class. Math. Her absolute worst subject. The one with the teacher who has no idea what he's doing and babbles on about the amazing vacation he had in the Bahamas rather than teaching the actual subject. This is the only reason she is failing.

  Erynn was a smart student. Before this year, she had a 3.99 grade average. One of the brightest in her class. But now she can hardly concentrate. With the unexpected tragedy that occurred over the summer, she could only ever think about that night. That one night that shifted her entire world.

July 14, 2016

1465 Shilling Ave.

Lebanon, Kansas

  Erynn had been working on a school project the night of the tragedy. Her partner had gotten terribly sick and was not able to help complete the assignment before the deadline. But Erynn did not mind. She very much enjoyed the challenges of school so it wasn't much of a problem. She had her headphones in, listening to her all time favorite band, and working slowly on the project that just so happened to be due at midnight.

  Because of her deafening headphones, she could not hear the screaming and fighting going on just a floor below her. Not until she heard the gunshot. Her head shot up in surprise and she bolted down the stairs. She ran towards the source of the sound, only to find something truly horrifying. Her mother laying on on ground, drenched in blood. And her father standing above her mother's bleeding body with a .44 Magnum Revolver in his hand. Erynn was frozen. She could not move even if she tried. It was only when her so called father stepped towards her, did she finally take a step back.