Unlike a drop of water which loses its identity when it joins the ocean, man does not lose his being in the society in which he lives. Man's life is independent. He is born not for the development of the society alone, but for the development of his self.
~B. R. Ambedkar
Well, here I was. My first day as a senior. It was my second year being without Kaylin. I had picked up a bit of a drinking problem along the way. I turned into one of those people who nobody wanted to talk to. After Kaylin’s death, I was my only friend. My other friends probably got tired of me or something and sort of…disappeared. I still think back to that day. I could’ve done something. I shouldn’t have left. Then I would’ve died with her. But she told me not to. I granted her last request. I wasn’t getting into good colleges, either. My grades sucked and that was the worst of it. Nobody tries to talk to me anymore. It’s like I’m the one who died, not Kaylin. People still talk about Kaylin. But I tune them out. I can’t listen to them talk about her like she was and idiot. She saved me. She died for me. I had a few hours before school started and I got a car for my birthday last year.
“Mom, I’m leaving!” I said. I didn’t even wait for her reply. I drove to the graveyard. I do this almost every day.
I walked over to a headstone that said “Kaylin Marie Linten” and under it “A beloved daughter, and friend.” I sat down in front of it. Dead flowers from her birthday lay there.
“Hey, Kay, I still miss you a lot. I’m having a hard time with the drinking problem, and I really wish you were here with me. You deserve to be alive, not me. I still can’t get that night out of my head. You took that bullet for me…and you told me to run. You saved me, and I never got to say thank you. I still don’t know what’s going to happen to me. I’m probably not going to go to college considering my grades. I’ve never been through life without you. You’ve always been there for me in person…and now you can’t.” I placed my head on the gravestone and just cried. I heard a twig snap and I whipped around. Since that day I’m not as innocent as I was. I pulled out a pocket knife and looked around, before leaving Kaylin’s grave stone. I dried my tears and just walked off. I got into my car. I opened the glove box where I put my mom’s whiskey and I took a big swig of it.
“No other way than starting the day off drunk!” I said, drinking more of it, the liquid scratching at my throat. I put the keys in the ignition and started it. I drove to school and realized I forgot my lock for the locker. Oh well, I’ll just skip today. I put the key back into the ignition and started to back out when this boy was standing behind my car. He was really a boy, he was a teenager, my age, but you know what? I didn’t care.
I honked the horn a couple times. He didn’t move. I was really close to just running him over. Is that an option? I finally had enough of him, so I got out of my car and walked over to him.
“Can’t you see I’m trying to leave?” I hissed at him. That’s probably the first time I’ve talked to somebody unrelated to me in about a year.
“You’re ditching?”
“Yes. Now I don’t want to talk to you so if you could move yourself over before I run you over, that’d be great!” I told him.
“Oh, you’re that Auryon chick everyone talks about.” He said. Fury was bubbling inside me.
“Oh darn, you guessed it.” I said, rolling my eyes.
“I saw you at Kaylin’s grave.”
“Oh, so now you’re spying on me?” I growled at him. He was really getting on my nerves.
“No, I had my reasons for being there. And you, I didn’t know you still could feel that way, with that little cold hearted shell you have.” He said. I rolled my eyes. “I also saw you drink half a bottle of whiskey. You’re drunk, therefore you aren’t driving.”
“But then how am I supposed to skip?” I said.
“I’ll drive you home.” He said
“Oh, no, no, no. You do not get to know where I live, you stalker.” I said, completely serious.
“Come on, you’re drunk, and school’s about to start, so either you let me drive you home or you’re not skipping.” He told me. I sighed and gave him the keys and I climbed into the passenger’s seat.
“If you crash my baby I’ll kill you. Seriously.” I told him. He looked at me, like he was scared and he nodded.
He started the car and drove out of the parking lot. What in the world did I get myself into?
He wasn’t a bad driver, I just didn’t like how he didn’t have any road rage. I opened the glove box and took out the half-gone whiskey bottle.
“No, put it in the back seat.” He said, keeping his eyes on the road. How did he know…?
“but-“ I started.
“I don’t give a crap so put that in the back seat.” He said seriously.
“God, you’re such a buzz kill!” I said. It was going to be a long, long day.
