High School

November 15th, 2016

- "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. This is beginning to become an obsession."

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The day started like any normal Tuesday would: We'd come back from the weekend bursting at the seams with gossip to tell our best friends. I had to update Brianna on all the latest news I've gathered.

"Yeah, so that guy doesn't have a crush on me!" Brianna exclaimed with a smile on her face. For some reason, she didn't like relationships and she felt weirded out whenever people had crushes on her. It wasn't unusual for people to find her attractive, or cute, although she hated that word with every ounce of her being.

"What?" I asked, still half-dead from having to wake up at an ungodly time. "What guy?"

"You know!" She stared at me. "His name starts with a G!"

I finally caught on to who she was talking about and replied, "Oh! How do you know?"

"Because Ricky told me. He finally confirmed it with me that the G dude doesn't have a crush on me."

I knew someone who did have a crush on her, though. I didn't know if I was allowed to tell or not, so I just kept it to myself. It's not like she'd act upon it anyway. I'd be very surprised if she did. The only reason she'd really act upon it is to be able to go to prom, since she's a sophomore.

The rest of breakfast went how it usually goes: We walk in circles, trying to stall as much as we could before needing to go to class. I've grown to not like school. It's very tedious and I feel as if I don't relate to anyone. But sitting in first hour with my friend Nicholas makes waking up so damn early suck a little less.

"Should I cut my hair?" A question he asks at least once every three days.

"No." The answer I always respond with.

"But everyone wants me to get it cut."

"Okay, but do you want to cut it?"

"Yeah. I think I'm gonna skip school today and go get it cut."

Slacker.

First hour only contained constant back and forth between me and Nicholas, shit-talk from the group of gals to the table in front of us, and redundant, confusing foreign language gibberish that I've lost interest in.

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Sitting in second hour, I realized how much I hate Algebra. It's very simple and easy, but I don't want to put forth the effort into solving the value of three measly letters that don't even correspond to real life application. I do know that I'll need to work harder in Algebra, since I want to be Dr. Grant (paleontologist from Jurassic Park) and all.

I often times get distracted in Algebra. I've found myself trying to pick back up in drawing/doodling. It always falls flat because inspiration seems to fail me nowadays. The disadvantages of growing older.

☆

Contemplating lunch was a necessity to my everyday life. I think about what'd I'd say to my crush, that is if I say anything to him at all. I always think I would, but when it comes to being in the same room as him, all words cease from my vocabulary and my face becomes numb.

I had the perfect shot to sit with him and his "jock" friends, but one of his friends was being rude and yelling at everyone who tried to sit next to him. Although, what's that sound in the distance? It's the excuse train! Choo, choo! Fuck.

I only put quotes around "jock" because I honestly don't believe that that's what they are. I believe they are people, human beings, students who go to my school. They dress differently than I do, and are interested in different things than I am, but that doesn't take away from the fact that they're my fellow class mates. Even if they're not in my grade. The bridge has to be gaped, and the ones repairing it right now are using faulty methods.

☆

While trying  to casually walk by my crushes classroom and sneak a glance, I was stopped in the hallway by none other than... Himself. Brianna and I turned the corner just as he walked out of his classroom. I panicked and froze as I watched the way he confidently carried himself.

Without hesitation, nor proper thought, the words, "Hey, Dex!" slipped out of my mouth. He responded with a just as friendly hey, but in the staccato sense. He was about to say my name, but stopped himself as if he forgot it.

Great.❧