What's On The Inside Matters

Part 24

So being the wierdo that I personify.. I didn't clarify who is left XD

Ima tell you guys.

1 America

2 Japan

3 England

4 Prussia

5 Romano

6 Germany

7 Italy

8 China

9 France

10 Russia

GUESS WHOS BACK

BACK AGAIN

FURRY TRASH

TELL A FRIEND

Lolololol

I have a reason for my absence. Many actually. And some of them may sound like excuses and im ok with that^^ ok. The first reason is that I started watching Naruto.. (fan number 34573498: SUUURE) and raisin to is I have lots o' school work. And the final Reagan is that I have some mental illnesses that I cant keep at bay as much as before... Like ADD, OCD, severe depression.... But ima put on a strong face and keep smiling^^ and you guys are the only ones ive actually told this to who will listen... My friends don't really pay mind to me when I hint at it... and I don't want my family to overreact so I feel kinda alone...

Ha. Enough with all of this depression stuff.. On to the story ^^

(I own nothing besides the plot and spelling errors btw~~)

3rd Person POV:

He wanted to hear his laugh. See his smile. Look through the world with sparking sky blue eyes that shone with a deep understanding of life, but fun. He should have done something to keep the pain away from him. But in the end, nothing works out for him doesn't it. He failed. Failed as an older brother.

"Hey Engwand..." a small voice spoke up, filled with sadness.

"What are you doing up so late lad?" Emerald eyes met a pair of tear-filled sky blue eyes.

"I had a scary dweam..."

"What about? If you don't mind me asking of course."

"I had a dweam that you left me... For a long time..." The smaller figure hesitated, "And then when you came back... You didn't like me anymore..."

"Where would you get that idea?" The green-eyed figure picked up the smaller figure and held him securely. "I promise that I will never not like you."

"You pwomise?"

"Yes. I promise."

He felt the rain and sweat pour down his back, mixing with the blood and mud of the battlefield of fallen soldiers from the battles previously fought.

"Damnit!" A young man with a war uniform ran out of the forest, feeling a bullet lodge itself in his shoulder, he tried to calculate the distance to his camp from where he was, but through the crowded haze and adrenaline fogging his mind, he was unable to do so. His allies were depending on him. He wouldn't let them down, he had a promise to prove was broken.

A collection of soft groans and light snores were the noises he woke up to, even in a place with no clocks, he could tell it was 6:00 AM sharp. His usual wakeup time, but one noise he didn't want to hear in the morning was that of soft crying, he didn't live with the right people for that.

"Birdie... I'm sorry... I didn't have the right chance to show that I still cared for you... You were never forgotten by me... Or even your brother... But I guess it's too late now... I'm sorry... Oh god... I'm so sorry... You can kill me now... Just bring back mein birdie... I miss you... Birdie... Mattie... Canada... I miss you so much... I just wish... I could join you... But you wouldn't want that... Right..? You want me to live on... So the others won't feel even more pain... But to be honest... I'm not sure how much more of this I can take... I just feel so lonely... And I can see it in your brother as well... But still... Why should I, an ex-nation be alive..? When you had to die..? I wish that there was a way to help you... But now I guess... That won't work... I guess... I'll have to help your brother... Would you want me to..? I want to be of use... Not useless weight that doesn't deserve life..."

The muffled crying and whispering stopped, turning into a soft snore. He could afford to help his brother, and show his soft side. With all that happened, he was sure that nobody would mind.

He had to be strong for his brother. He was West Germany and he was East. That's the way it would always be. Until Prussia came back. Until everyone was relatively back to the way they were before. Back when America smiled with genuine laughter, England and France fought on the floor with China being pulled into it while clinging to Japan for help, Russia either hiding from Belarus or muttering words in the 'corner of doom', when Italy still rambled about pasta and clung to him and Romano, who was bothered by a drunk Spain. When Canada snuck out of the room to feed his polar bear and make pancakes that would always appear in the room, calming everyone down, unless the BTT or the Awesome Trio crashed the meeting with Sealand and the other micronations.

Back when there were less problems.

It was a shame that that was all a fantasy.