The Bad Boy's Chain

Chapter Two, Part One - Dirty

That Wednesday evening, I sat outside on the deck, cross-legged at the patio table, listening to my iPod. I was uploading a discussion post on women's literature when Jesse texted me a boomerang video of him stealing all the peppermints from his P.O.'s desk.

omg jess u r going 2 hell

good dogs go 2 heaven

not this one lmao

The sight of Kerry sprawled in the lawn chair across from me wiped the smile clean off my face.

"Okay, that's it, we're getting a home security system." I closed my laptop with a weary sigh and removed one of my earbuds. "What do you want, Kerry?"

"That's easy--to be ravaged by the sex-god impersonating your brother." Kerry dug idly through the small pile of Cosmos assembled, heedless of my horrified expression.

"Step-brother. And if you want him so bad, go do it." And why not tap-dance on a minefield once you've finished...

"I would, but I can't--and therein lies the problem." Kerry twitched her hair from her shoulder in aggravation. "Jesse is just not... interested." Her lips thinned in self-consciousness - an alien feeling for girls like her, who are used to getting what they want when they want it.

"That's, um, surprising." Especially considering how much effort Jesse put into getting laid. It went past a hobby, it was more like his religion. Even though Kerry wasn't officially his girlfriend, she was still his goddess.

"Surprising is hardly the word." She held her phone between her hands, inspecting it like it too could do better. "More like, unsatisfactory. Limp. He's practically non-erectile."

I cut off the giggle with a cough and cleared my throat. "And why are you sharing this with me?"

Kerry exhaled, leveling me with her frosty gaze. "Because you're the only person who knows Jesse like I do. You can tell me what I'm doing wrong."

Is she for real? "So lemme get this straight--you're asking me for relationship advice? After you blackmailed me to stay out of your relationship? And then threatened to cut me in my sleep? Don't you have friends?"

"I hate my friends. Besides, if they knew I was having problems with Jesse they'd swoop right in. You, are the only one I can trust."

Figures. I groaned, removing the other earbud in misery. "Fine! Look, Jesse's been a little distracted lately, so I wouldn't be surprised if your usual tactics aren't getting through to him."

"Alright, Dr. Phil, then what do I do?"

"Well, you can try switching things up. Do something different."

"Okay... Like what?"

I shrugged. "I dunno... Have you tried doing something nice for him?"

"No." She wrinkled her nose in distaste.

"I have an idea. Jesse wants to go to the lake this weekend. Why don't you surprise him with a welcome-back party? You can even say it was your idea. His probation officer is kind of a dick, but he lets Jesse stay out late on Saturdays."

"Hmm..." Kerry scratched her chin with the sparkly nail of one slender finger. "A surprise party in which you do all the legwork and I take all the credit--fabulous."

Jesse loved parties but he hated surprises - especially surprises involving him. But there was no going to the lake alone with Jesse - that I was even more sure of. If it came down to staying on Kerry's good side, I'd throw a kick-ass bash and shoot a KERRY WUVS JESSIE firework right over the lake if I had to.