Mind and Matter

29 | Leo

"What just happened?"

A minute passed by and then two, and she was still nestled against my chest as if I was her only lifeline. Her breathing had slowed down, and she closed her eyes, making me worry she would fall asleep again, except this time in my arms. I nudged the top of her shoulder, and she jarred out of my hold.

"Sorry. I must seem clingy." God, she still acted like we were complete strangers and hadn't spent the last three and a half months in each other's faces every day.

"You're not. But I think you shouldn't act like something isn't wrong with you."

"It was just a bad dream."

Like she says about the rest of them, I bet.

I leaned my head back onto the top of the couch and stared at the solid white ceiling. "Who was in it?"

"How do you know it was a who?"

I shrugged. "A lucky guess." And maybe because she'd clung to me as if her mind hadn't registered her dream wasn't real. "Was it me?"

"It's stupid. A simple nightmare shouldn't shake me up when I'm this old."

"You want to know something?" I asked, wincing as memories began to pop in my head, one after the other. She nodded. "My dad used to have bad dreams a lot. I don't think he even was fully aware of it—or maybe he was, but what forty-something year old man with a big ego would tell his son about something as seemingly embarrassing as that?"

"Then how did you know he experienced them?"

A small puff of air escaped my nose as I recalled the last time it'd happened. Less than a year ago. "Because the only thing he'd do when he had one was come to my room, stand in my open doorway for a few moments, and then calm down and leave. You don't how many times I'd pretend to have been asleep."

"Did you ever know what they were about?"

"You think?" I scoffed. "I don't even know his favorite food, let alone what plagues his mind at night."

"I dreamt of you." She blurted this out the moment I finished my sentence, and she sunk back into the couch, covering her face with her hands. I placed mine over hers and slowly pulled them away.

"Me?" To be honest, I didn't think I was that influential to land in someone's dreams. Then again, her dream didn't sound much like rainbows and giggles by then.

"Yeah, you. It's never consistent. Sometimes it's you. Sometimes it's just me. Sometimes they make no sense. Sometimes they make complete sense. One thing that's consistent is that I can't ever get rid of them."

"Don't say that."

"Say what?"

"That they won't ever go away. Maybe you just need a new perspective. Maybe if you let loose for once, your head will feel more like it should be—a gift and not a prison."

"When did you become so...poetic?"

"Since now." I curled my arms around her shoulders and brought her to my lap. She shifted at first, not having expected to be this close. Maybe that was what she needed. To stop expecting things. "Let things not go according to plan sometimes. You'll thank me later."

"Oh, like this?" She leaned in and connected her lips to mine. She placed her hands on both sides of my face and led the kiss for the most part, but it was shorter and sweeter than our last two. Before she pulled away, I encircled her back against, letting her curl up against my chest.

"You wanna try the sleeping thing again?" I asked, brushing her curls away from her eyes.

"I'll probably have another shitty dream, and you'll have to comfort me again."

"You say it like that would be a burden," I chuckled and leaned down to kiss the top of her head.

Closing her eyes through a smile, she leaned her head against my chest and fell asleep to the sound of my heartbeat, always a bit tachycardic in her presence.

☆

The next school day, Neve approached me randomly as I walked down the hallways to deliver some papers to the office for Mr. Clark.

"Leo," she said, tilting her head up higher and giving me a meek smile. "I've been wanting to talk to you."

"If it's about what happened, it's really fine—"

"It's really not. Well, at least until I can talk to you. It's just..." She paused and folded and unfolded her hands. "I wanted to say thank you. It's all I can find to say that won't sound like utter garbage."

I shook my head, playing with the letter in my hand. "You didn't even have to. Honestly, it was the right thing for me to do, no matter who it was. Don't feel guilty about it and go be happy that asshole is never coming back here again."

She shot me a smile, but it faded fast. "I feel so bad for making you have to have fought him of all people. I mean, people warned me about Blake, and if I hadn't been so stupid maybe I would've never been there and you— "

"Neve, you can't blame yourself for what he did. Yeah, there's always the better decision, but it could've been worse. You're safe, and that's what counts."

"You're right." She then stepped forward in the other direction, checking her phone for the time. She shrugged, even though she was already late to her third period and the secretary was probably already growing impatient waiting for my letter. "I just wanted to tell you Emerson is lucky. My friends would probably die if they heard this, but I think you're a cute couple."

"You might wanna get better friends then," I said, rounding the corner. "Because Emerson's the best thing that's ever happened to me."