Muttered Curses || Bill Cipher X Reader

2. [A New Dawn]

Something was tickling your skin, waking you from your slumber. Your eyebrows knitted together as the feeling multiplied. Slowly, sleepily, you opened your eyes to see what was bothering you.

There were giant spiders everywhere.

You screamed, bringing up an arm to brush them away from you before they could get in your mouth. When others were thrown off, more began crawling up your legs or torso. Quick, heavy footsteps ran to the guest room, and the door flew open to reveal Calvin and Bill. Your best friend let his mouth fall in shock, while the latter put a hand to his mouth, eyes crinkling up slightly and revealing his smile.

"Bill, get rid of all of these spiders, NOW," You commanded, muffling your voice by covering your own mouth with your hand to protect it from the spiders. One particularly large one crawled up your hand and sat itself right on your nose.

"You sure? I just thought you could use some friends."

"BILL."

With a slight chuckle, the demon snapped his fingers. Instantly, all of the spiders disappeared, except the one on your nose. Bill came closer and scooped that one up, petting it gently and cooing at it. "C'mon, you were afraid of this little guy?"

You looked around you, not completely convinced that all the spiders were gone. Calvin rushed in the room and sat on the edge of your bed, putting an arm around your shoulders and glaring at Bill. "Let's kick him out," he seethed in a low voice, glowering at the demon. If Bill heard, he pretended not to and opted to walk to your window and put the spider on the wall outside instead.

It was a tempting offer, but you shook his head. "No. He'll do more damage if we don't watch over him." Giving Calvin a side eye, you shrugged his arm off of your shoulder. "You're the one who summoned him in the first place anyway."

"Yeah, yeah," he grunted. "I'll go make breakfast."

He left the door behind slightly ajar, leaving it only a sliver open. Bill smirked and turned around, running a gloved hand through the blonde side swept portion of his hair. "(Y/n), I'm honored! You don't want to get rid of me yet?"

Sigh. You watched him for a minute, still a little on edge from the spiders. "Why'd you do that?" You asked quietly.

"Hm? Oh, the spiders?"

"Yeah, didn't I tell you not to make things go crazy?" The cane appeared again out of nowhere, landing on the floor so Bill could rest a hand on it.

"No, I believe you told me, 'No destroying the living room tonight,' which not only gave me free reign to mess with any other room in the apartment, but now I can mess with the living room today." He explained, the grin on his face only growing with every word he spoke.

You felt your gaze slowly get more and more viscous. "Tell me, Bill, are there any limits to your power?"

Arrogance radiated around him. "Very few, most unknown or unattainable."

"Then why the hell are you finding such joy in destroying a human apartment when you could be destroying a universe or something?"

Bill tapped his chin in deep thought. "You know, that's actually not a bad idea. Say goodbye to the world you know and lo-"

"NO!" You yelled, already tired of dealing with the demon. The clock on your bed stand started to beep, signaling it was 9:30, which was when you meant to get up. This day was going to be far too long. "You know what? There's only one thing I can think of doing that will keep you under control."

"Oh? And what's that?" Bill asked, looking amused at the thought of you doing anything to hinder him. Taking a deep breath, you looked straight into his golden eye.

"Bill Cipher, you are not allowed to use your magic unless given explicit, spoken permission by me and only me, or in the case of an emergency- an emergency by my standards. I'll draw up more specific rules after breakfast."

***

Other than the sound of forks against plates and the sound of chewing, the dining room table was awkwardly silent. Calvin kept a weary eye on Bill, who had his arms crossed and cheeks puffed out like a child, refusing to eat. "What's his deal?" Calvin asked.

"I told him no magic," you answered with your mouth full. With a raised eyebrow, his gaze turned from suspicious to curious.

"So, are you a basically a human or something?" He asked, earning a scoff and an eye roll.

"Don't be thinking I'm like you in any way, kid. I'm still immortal, and much smarter than you'll ever be."

"You're not like me in any way? Well, walking on the street, anybody would easily think you're just a regular-"

A fork flew past his head and pierced the wall behind Calvin, who gulped his mouthful nervously. Bill glowered at him and said, "And I don't need my magic to take a life as weak as yours."

"Okay, that's enough!" You interrupted cheerfully, reaching over to take everything away from Bill. "Let's set up some ground rules, shall we?"

Bill leaned back in his chair, trying to calm himself a little so he could actively negotiate the rules. Calvin grabbed his laptop and fired up a word document. "Alright, I vote rule number one should be 'No destroying any document that restricts your power'."

Nodding, you began to stack the dishes and take them to the kitchen. "And rule number 2 should just be 'Don't kill anybody'."

A smile pulled at Bill's lips. "Nice priorities."

Calvin gave him a nasty look over the screen. "Or just 'Abide by any human laws'."

"Unless given permission from me or in a legitimate emergency."

The sound of Calvin typing stopped, prompting you to turn around. "Wait, you're giving him permission to break the law?"

"Well, self defense."

"He's immortal. He'll be fine."

"How about in our defense?"

Calvin scoffed, typing up your rules again. "Like hell he'd defend us."

You gave Calvin a warning glance, sitting at the table again. Bill looked to be turning the rules in his mind, trying to find loopholes. Every now and again, he'd smile, signaling he found one.

After sharing a glance with Calvin, you grabbed the laptop,deleted what you had, and restarted typing. Once you were done, you displayed the screen.

OPERATION MAKE SURE BILL DOESN'T END THE WORLD

Bill made no efforts to hide his laugh.

1. Bill must be accompanied by (Name) (Last Name) or Calvin Harris at all times.

2. Bill may use his powers, but only for harmless and legal purposes.

3. No more bugs

*All rules are subject to change
*Any rule can be added or taken away, ONLY by (Name)(Last Name)
*Any rule can be overruled ONLY by (Name)(Last Name)
*In case of an emergency, rules hold no bearing

"What do you think?" You asked, looking at both of their faces for approval. Calvin sighed and crossed his arms.

"I think you're giving him too much freedom."

Bill was quick to interrupt. "Don't be silly! He just doesn't like me. I think this is a perfect starting point." The fact that Bill liked your idea raised a few red flags, but you ignored it.

"Vinny, I need you to work with me. Please?" You asked in your sweetest voice. Leaving to change your clothes, you added, "Bill, don't be an ass."

"If I take that only in a literal sense, am I still following the rules?"

"BILL."

***

It gets better I promise